Why I Had to Steal From You
Dear Girl in the Mirror,
I am the only one at your funeral
But the tears are caught in my throat
Because I watched you slowly fade
And I let you slip away unnoticed
Only because I wanted to wear your skin
And make it a refuge
I was tired of being locked in the prison you called your shadow
But I‘ve robbed you of more than just your body
I hear your name from our sisters
And echoes of she and her
Are whispered among classrooms
They don't know you are gone
But I do
I know the clothing holding our chest together made your lungs collapse
And you choked on the word tomboy
I knew your heart had stopped beating long before I said my name out loud
This was supposed to be a eulogy
But how can I praise something that didn’t want to exist
I knew the questioning thoughts circling in my mind were suicide notes written by your fingers
When I sought out answers to the word "Boy?" I signed my new name on your death sentence
But I didn’t want dysphoria to add my grave next to yours
Someday I’ll find a old picture of you and have a bittersweet smile
Because you’ll be proud of the man I’ve become
Thank you for saving me...
-Brandon
Comments
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Axelz
I nearly cried reading this. Thank you so much for writing this gorgeous piece. You summed up a lot of difficult emotions perfectly <3
ElliotSaysHi
"But I didn’t want dysphoria to add my grave next to yours" this line made me cry, thank you for this poem, it reflects so much of what I'm dealing with.