"why"

why would I drive 60 miles to see if hat smile was real? Why would I go against the wind knowing I'd already blown my own mind? Why would I put the keys in the ignition knowing this wouldn't just result with a talk in the kitchen? Why wasn't I thinking with my brain, but with my heart...? Why Would I not just put my foot down, not on the pedal, but on the concrete? I'm the only one feeling this defeat, and when I left I knew your memories would easily forget everyhing when the sun rose. But I still let you come close, and in that moment my heart broke, my words were a prodcut of a simple choke. You made me swallow my words, my feelings, my pride, you made me lose myself and there's nothing else I can do other than let you stay in the past and never catch up to the future I'll be a part of. And you ask my why I would do what I did. You'll never understand my reasioning even if you tried. I've lived too long and cried too many times to figure out who i am, and for you to understand would be a lie, and all you'll ever know to ask is... "Why?"

11:11