'lost'
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I saw him,
but then I remembered he is no more
¶¶¶¶¶
It's funny right? How you were here once,
but now you aren't.
my heart is empty
heavy like a led weight
yet i walk ever steady
down the thickly wooded path
on this dark and ominous night
moving debri and thicket out of my way
My tears spill over
Forever leaking, gushing, flowing tears
The embodiment of fear and disappointment
Am I not enough?
Not worthy of love
Worthless
Spiralling Spiralling Spiralling
A one way trip but she's blocked
Left, right, up
Too much for goddess of madness to concoct
It won't go through
She can't get in
Had to bid adieu
To left, right, up
You see, When I take a moment and look back. Back at all the moments in my past, I see all the dreams I've left behind. All the scenes I left unseen and I think, I think "where did the time go?" When I close my eyes and listen, Just listen to you
Endless ocean of stolen tears
Only the waves know your fears
Crashes and ashes and waterfall gears
Irrelevance fades as you soak up the beer
Mom says, “you’re just hungry.”
Dad says, “you’re just tired.”
But it’s not just that!
I’m starving, don’t you see?
When I was younger I imagined you would never meet your grandchildren
Forgive my honesty, I just didn't think you had it in you
Growing up hearing, "I never wanted kids" sets up quite a disappointing example
Your words dropped to the floor like the weapons that they were,For you cared not for what you meant to me,For you cared not that your words stung like a slap to the face,
I needed you like I needed a cigarette. Like tar to my lungs, you poisoned my life. I was only 17 and thought, "This is what love is"...
It was more like drowning.
It's how it is, it's life.
I look up and there's a big cloud;
Caterpillar shaped and fluffy.
I look down and there's a hole in my sock.
I stare across and there's a beautiful smile
Searching
Where are these words I try to speak
Where are these emotions that come before sleep
Why can't I open up to you when you're in front of my face
Why let them out once you've walked away
It's so far beyond "Depression" it's lost, Disconnected. I feel that there is no light at the end of my tunnel. I'm in this abyss of nothingness, and there's no one else here to even see.
What have I done wrong,
Yet what have I done right?
I feel so unwanted,
But I know You hold me tight.
My life is changing quickly,
But it feels like I'm on pause.
Problems are arising;
Darkness, a Titan of uncertainties, holding reins of pain.
He whom stifles…
He whom suffocates…
He whom has not a care…
The beholder of lost hopes and of misconceptions.
He that wishes for the broken
