Struggling

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Sometimes by Brandon Arthur King Sometimes, the brightest lights cast the darkest shadows.
Based off my understanding ,   Poetry can reveal, come through pain ,can politely hide, or it can simply amplify anything and anyone.  
Why are the words I write more powerful than the voice I have been given?  My grandmother says God has provided me with ears to listen, and a mouth to speak, but my hands were never assigned a task. 
To my before me, I miss you terribly The naivety you had the light that bestowed upon your eyes
Dear Struggling Self, You can't see the forest through the trees, you feel like you're drowning, suffocating,  just trying to wrap your head around it all.   Yes, you have had a rough four years, 
I'm wrecked You dont know how much I bend I fall easily with the cold wind I shatter with the touch of a hand I'm the titanic Swimming in a ton of ice Sinking into darkness and vice
I know what she's going through. I know who's aiming at who. I understand this world is pretty bad, I understand better than her dad. I know it hurts, hurts to be picked apart and thrown together...
Like a baby, my first steps are difficult. I fall countless times. There are bruises and wounds to remember the struggle. And like a baby, I keep trying. Like a baby, I look ahead and find Father waiting for me.
Tiny pieces of pain Dripping into a new facade Overflowing weeping tears, Tears in reality.  People’s faces torn,
Have I ever wished to dive into a ravine? I would have said no.   I'm forced to say yes. What were once my sweetest dreams crash upon the rocks.   Drain the mania;
  Fluttering wings splashes light painted amongst cicada hums Thy fingers intertwined in roots Yet drawn to graves of lapsed youth
If life as a 17 year old is supposed to be a walk in the park, then why do I feel like I’m drowning in the ocean? I feel like I no longer have control over my life.
As my nail polish chips, So does my composure I bend my head to cry On my own shoulder   My own imperfections Reflected back at me In the fading colors   The lacquer covers
BON VOYAGE All of the doubt and pain Has turned my head Into a baby's rattle And the shaking toy... Feels like an earthquake And all the toys noise... Is the only sound I hear
The tight grip of insanity spreads through my mind, stealing everything that once kept me living.
Dreams that compose an ever-so-distant me Wrap around in a cloak of contingency  Mirrored walls guard my heart Deflecting and rejecting all chances of happy
Impressive in your eyes I seem, but more Impressive yet are you who believe in my life so vague, filtered to exclude the truth.   My anxious fingers produce
Smiling, laughing, eternally cheery Why can't anyone hear my screaming? Showing the world my best face Make sure that the mask stays
"Alone, alone, alone..." The phrase that plagues my mind day in and day out... Yet it rings true about who I really am.  I am alone. Feeling ever so distant;
Every time I finally start to overcome 
Here I sit, once again, pondering why Why did I take this class? Am I crazy? I tap and tutter, releasing a sigh. I don't understand; study more, lazy. Chemistry, O Chemistry, thou art death.
If I could, I would take away all the pain The pain I feel every day. I know I am not alone,
They ask me if I'm confused? They ask me if it's a phase? They tell me it's a choice. That I wasn't born this way.
Her tears were almost as rare as her smile Her world of color was stricken with black Her eyes crept with tears as they did      A tactful guile As her face she hid But each time in the corner
They say it happens to everyone. They say it will soon be done. We've been struggling since I was nine.  Been hearing it will be all fine.  Growing up I was mostly gay.
Thoughts fluttering my conscience mind as I try to unwind from time spent making seven twenty-five and a dime. How can I be at ease knowing that I have two mouths to feed and no one to take heed to the pain that is felt within. 
Struggling Day and Night. Day by day we’re struggling. From the time I began speaking. Remembering the talks of stressing,
Stuggling- For someone to                   -understand- Hear me in the silence                 Not just read, but listen to my thoughts Feel
Please listen to me as I speak, I speak truth, I speak wisdom to you, hear me now as I say you are more  to God than anyone today. Look up in the night sky, do you see those stars? God loves you more than each
The body and the earth shakes All the while the waves quake With untangible thoughts of a body So the sand breaks   Into grains in the mind Stringed noodles of a hallowed concubine
To degrade self esteem Of a human soul Can degrade life itself Depression takes its toll For the weak Don't feel complete Until withering Has reached its peak Utter despair strikes
To degrade self esteem Of a human soul Can degrade life itself Depression takes its toll For the weak Don't feel complete Until withering Has reached its peak Utter despair strikes
My eyes are heavy and my thoughts are tired I drift into my mind Searching for the answers
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