shame

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I betrayed myself During my younger days, And opened myself up to shame, I betrayed myself During my younger days, Over and over again,   And there are times That knowing what I did
“Hey man, saying this for your own good.”  
Cadbury eggs at 1 AM How much lower could you be? I know that it does not mean much But it could be two or three?   Besides don’t I deserve this? For waking up before it was 2
Can I ask why are you staring? Could it be perhaps my size? Or is it cause I’ve got these planets swirling in my eyes?  
Looking in the mirror, nine years old,  Almond eyes blink. And I hate them, wishing they were bigger.  Shiny dark hair, smooth honey skin  In a world full of blonde curls and blue eyes.   
How could i have been assaulted again? I must have asked for it I was leading him on anyway
He’s fucking up to prove he has a conscience went to the hardware store  next day  got himself a door built  so when fists come a knocking  he’ll now know better to let in guilt guest of honor 
To make up for deficiencies Lacking or discrepancies To fix or make anew What's broke and disagrees with you. "But I haven't sinned!" I hear you cry "It went that way alone, awry!"
It's simply futile treading cold water Rising past my green ankles O how its barbarous teeth bite and sting!    My toes are engulfed by sea's spiteful jaws  Veins pierced by blind eyes;
"how much is too much" i ask my mirror whilst i cake on the makeup too light for my skin they dont want me because i dont look like them  i am the alien with my brown skin and 
live in the moment and have some fun you're blind, you're naive, you never listen get crazy and wild; worry when you're done mind's empty, heart's dull, but your soul glistens  
It’s the devil in DISGUISE, When you look into its eyes, You become mesmerized. An eater of souls and a dark cloud above, At one point you thought it was LOVE. You’d give up your LIFE just to have a TASTE.
my past defines me, i am, the girl he keeps from his friends, a secret, not good enough, unheard
They heard my muffled crying and told me it would be alright.    They missed me when I hid away but left me to my dark repreive.   
So many lines. So many, Different kinds of pain that write themselves Under different names: Necessity, shame, another I can’t explain. And still more, more still and, Is this some kind of game?
Tears set in blood on a child's face, A child betrayed by older men, Dissolve with a blush of embarrassed shame, As five long years of silence begin.   Confused hands tremble in a disoriented state,
MY NAME IS: OCD walk it wrong and they will die, wait until it's safe to cry. draw the crimson from your arm, maybe they'll stay safe from harm.   MY NAME IS: HOMELESSNESS
Dear Dad, My life was mine until that July, it was to be my birthday soon. You grabbed my face and looked me in the eye told me you loved me without realizing that was goodbye.
Slipped down your throat until you lose the feeling in your toes and the tingle can be felt at the back of your head The last Valentines Day was the worst until you met him and now the worst comes this year
Sometimes I wanna say what I think I should have saidand sometimes I keep things all in my headmy mouth closedneedle and threada zipper acrossmy lips of red
To the boy on the bus, with the thick brown hoodie and the old running shoes and the wireframed glasses and the ripped jeans that started at the knees when you bought them but strecthed to your lower thigh.  
Bitter Sweet Exhaustion   I wish I would have known I wish I would have known That beauty is a just shapeshifter that turns into the nightmare shown
  Frozen hands on the face Echoing, echoing Killing me without a trace The silence, loud in my ear What then, oh my, oh dear, oh dear   That’s it, I’m done, life’s not worth living
I've fallen into the mirror again Eyes on me, but where have mine been Escape this version I try to explain Lost within the thoughts in my brain   Anticipating the end of my rope
Do you ever wanna cry but the tears won't come?For the fear, and the shame, and whats been done.Do you ever wanna cry but the tears are drowned?All you left with is an angry frown.
You were the gold standard I wished I could be Maybe then I would've stayed out of trouble And a little less me   maybe then when my name was called It would not have been to be berated
Staring at this screen, Cracked. Broken. Barely working. This is love. This feeling of emptiness, my finger, a heavy brick on one word: send, this is love. This vacant lot of self-respect,
I am beyond tired of people Shaming the mentally ill. This day in which we live Tells us that if we are sad Than it is not as bad as we think. That we need to pull up our pants  and grow up
I
I was a little brat. I threw tantrums. I hit, bit, and scratched. I didn't care about others. I only thought about myself. I loved myself.   I am alone. I isolate myself.
All the feelings I have choked down have finally ignited in my stomach. All the words I cannot say (as they are not “acceptable”) have given over to acidity, and begun to boil in my belly. 
At parties, I will do some freaky dances with calories cus I’m like nutella dark, chocolate, and nutty.  Yeah,  I’m not one to hide my love of food,  in front of you, I’ll demolish a 
don't flatter yourself darling they never loved you they never even loved the idea of you   they loved the fact that you're both easy and a challenge you're just running
I should've noticed that you never actually cared. Shame on me. I should have seen that you hated everyone around you, including myself. Shame on me.
my fault is another's laughter.my soul begins to sink as my red faceinks in myembarrassment.the smile i've putthere is convincing,but it's a show.under the apathyi'm blinking
We all get offeneded This is due to wounds that were never fully mended There is no such place on Earth where something cannot hurt us So why do we continue to fuss My heart longs for those who are hurt
forced and false  fake will fall  you must be real  to withstand at all  because smiles won't get you through hard times  but peace and prayer through this upward climb  stand in line 
My transition into adulthood has been accompanied by a series of mistakes. I’ve failed friends in their time of need; felt the regret a little too late. I’ve sacrificed my own self worth in trade for boys handing out limitless heartaches. I’ve ind
The King of Shadows Was broken in battle When a man stepped up and got nailed to a cross but He was not lost no, even Death He fought  not for Himself but for us even our soul had been marked
This water I drink is like a pool. I can feel the residue that I know comes from                                                                        others.  
"Yes your majesty You claim  But it turned to trajedy  Not fame The core left me Am i to blame? what's it bring me? Nothing but shame But when i called out Nobody came
"My mind is full of fire The terror can get no higher I need to run away Anything to escape This world so full of pain And memories of the shame As though it didn't leave a stain
"Watch from a distance As the girl he loves caved Picks up her head  As she tried to be brave Tears cried alone  He knew he could save  Her eyes held an anguish  Was it too late?
"I am lost, Here alone As though the frost Has reached my bones I am tossed  Onto the stone As my smile is a clone Tears run free, you should have known all that's left is skin and bone."
"A battle within a battle  A heart within a heart I'd be lost without you I don't know where to start But as I look away My anger turns to shame To yell would not be right 
"It's hard enough to live Without the hurt and pain But I can't seem to win Or stop the awful shame But since I'm not seen at all I watch my spirit fall And try to find a way
I’m a femme fatalemy father taught me wellLike Mata Hari my charms arefor my victims to dispelLike the mistress Laura Bellthe Queen of London Whoredomone day I may find the Lord but
They think that we be killing they think that we be stealing  They think that every nigga in the hood is just a villain If we in an alley don't mean we are dealin
(For all the victims of sexual harassment)   Their names were many, Their faces were multiple. I simply called them “fearful”, They simply called me “easy”.  
christ chose to lift her at this time, "To die is better than to live," is written in the Book of Life.
one year on, one year on Two arrows
one year on, one year on Two arrows
  Honor unto death,
  I am good enough,
Asian shame painful,
Words unsaid at home,
Not getting straight A’s,
Shame! 
  It’s frustrating,
your lips touched me and brought what flows through my body up to the surfaceand it was a beautiful thing and i finally believed that who i was was beautifuli was myself and i was no longer ashamed of it but
They say, "keep your friends close But your enemies closer." I ask, then, how do you know? Who is your friend And who is your foe? One moment it's sunshine And happiness and laughter.
  Memories are a part of me, They drift apart from me. So many thoughts, just like my old matchbox cars, Simpler times---remember pogo sticks and toy guns,
"Just be yourself." I've heard that line a thousand times Which self? The one that gets me admiration and respect, or the one who swings between lows and elation,
She asked.
She doesnt know she poor, Even when life tells her in many ways Her refrigerator becomes empty. Whenever she is hungry she can't even find a whole meal. Her family barley has enough food to last them until they can get more.
First the mud was dredged from the reeded river by the potter’s boy who slid his hands in the cool sludge and made his friends with the wet earth. In the studio, the inert mass waited to be yanked off in chunks, to be shaped by adroit hands – like...
No rhythm No rhyme Just me And myself Dark hands Bright face WIth a dim glow in the eyes Worn out By the challenge Of living each day with a smile Inside
This shame you make me feel For telling the truth For standing up for myself Is shame unjustified. This guilt you plant in me For apologizing For being too honest Is guilt unjustified.
Dishonesty creeping Through trembling fingers  Acts normal on the outside While hate grows within.   All the while guilt and  Apprehension stir in the object
There are demons pressing in on me. There are demons pressing out on me. It's as if when my eyes hit the mirror they hit the bullseye for my body to grow. the  bullseye is really a trigger.
Behind the hazel, she's just a lonely little one. Behind the hazel, she wants to the world to be gone. Behind the hazel, she's fighting everyday. Behind the hazel, she's scared in every way. Behind the hazel, she's slightly shattered.
“Free me”, she screams in his face.“No more.No more a moore.I am a river.I flow.I live and give
I hate these ballet shoes Everyday marks another bruise And as I dance with the pain, my brain is in flames, going insane   Working double time over what should be considered a war-crime
Behind the curtain What I keep hidden From your eyes and mind Is strictly forbidden   Under the mask What a clever disguise
we are full of stories to tell memories we store and dreams that we sell soon they fade from view sadly they dry as the morning dew ignorant of a dream's worth or a lesson to which  memory gave birth
your cruel words slam into me like a trainwreck attaching themselves to my every thought they soon become a part of my being tattooed, exposed, unsettling i slowly peel off the layers with help from friends
I have been taught To dream, But not in excess, To hope, But not so much, To fight, But not too hard, Because maybe, I will find The backbone  to burst out
You might want to get out a pen and paper and take some notes Listen up, no texting please, awkward eyes contact is necessary We’ll start with some basic rules, you'll want to write them down
I watch his eyes with a breaking heartMy life falls to peices when we are apart.My love for him kills me, like a cold, sharp knifeI'd give him my all, I'd give him my life.
Something's missing from your history books. Cinderella is far from a fabel, And Disney's a money-hungry liar. Her name was actually Daji Mei Fang. The clock struck twelve, she lost her left slipper.
Another day One of hatred and greed A world of sin with no consequence For the deed No shame For the world is the same Keeps on trudging Day after day But stop
So many competitors, not enough prizes  I hope to seek a win in some of my suprises My ambition to win is higher than most  Although I've been passed by as if I'm a ghost
A letter to my mother   My mother hates me and I don’t know why We just can’t seem to see eye to eye She disrespects me to the ump degree Now I’m going to tell you what’s in my decree  
A mountain of fear A valley of guilt A river of shame And a world of sin   Do not bow your head in defeat There are things we must not accept
Love not Hate Bake the cake Shake the fate Other men make   Hang and gangs Fools with tools Rules for schools Colored wernt cool   Governtment just drooled
A genuine lust of morning'sVoiceThere I slumber, and ponderAbout the tresspassers of the dayAnd the smell of the roses fill theCream cooled air of my mindWhile my arrival is very slow and timed
people today think they know what respect truly is, when they don't even respect the opinions of others.
My skin cannot find its’ purpose in newspapers uncomfortable it makes you ashamed guilt makes you look dirty little girl played slavery when she was seven tar baby
She said we'll never talk about it again That doesn't mean she won't think about it I did wrong And I feel like shit Why do I always fall into the Devil's temptations?
I feel dirty I am ashamed I am a disgrace How long did I think I could keep this up? Even though I knew that it wouldn't be long till I was found out Every time Never fails I feel like crying
I try so hard, even when I feel I have made some progress It is for naught.   My line is corrupt.
Oma
She was beautiful once. She was feisty once. She could ride a Harley, choke a stogie and found herself as a fine woman of the 50’s.
Why does she float around with no shame? With words that are utterly sweet yet so crisp The optimisim that lives inside of her only to express it to everyone else   No matter how great of a feature on him
Da
When my Great Grandmother was near death in the hospital I was curious to see what an old person's butt looks like, so I kept standing on my tippie toes to catch a see
I was an ass. I was shy but an ass. When I worked up the courage to talk, all this gross undeserved arrogance would spill out like: "I'm probably smarter than you."
Thoughts of her Dripping into my sternum From all the way up there In my brain Where she has implanted herself   Like an alien egg    
hands and knees burn from the rug’s roughness and the trees bow their heads children’s faces wet with the sins of yesterday ropes pulled
Looking around. Biting lip. Sickness whirls into your stomach. Nausea hits you out of nowhere. Palms sweat. All of a sudden it feels unbearable to just stay still. You have to move. You have to escape. But you can't.
Justin Bieber with his pants sagging so low touring round the world with pot to blow. While little girls are following screaming his name, giving our society a face of shame.   Justin Bieber such a shame
The sun shines bright, but thou smile shines brighter,                                                All becomes well, my worries begin to fade;                                                                We lie beneath the tree, laughing in t
On words alone, you taste faith. On belief alone, you see the ageless. On lie alone, you feel nothing real. On truth alone, you hear a song. On visions alone, you are the fake seer.
We stand to fall, We run to crawl, We laugh to cry, and we live to die. No matter what turn you take, your actions all lead to fate. The fate at the end of the road you're on, 
ink smeared onto palms touching smelling of slight rust and the ever present sweat sweat off of a workers back who comes home to find what? his wife sitting watching ellen asking questions why are you so tired?
His pale skin burning in the sun Is all that people see But then at night when darkness comes He changes completely.
Living two life's, I flicker between the two, Pretending the corrupt is nonexistent. I put on my mask, Hiding my imperfections, And shunting the cruel reality into a dream.
There are three who share this trait That can even beat fate They hid with ugliness But once they know Their true colors as time pass Their beauty will surpass Everyone A broken family they appear
Who Am I? What makes me, me? I have been ashamed of me. Afraid of me. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I wonder why You chose me, What do You see in me that I can't see?
My King has come, He is a wilderness that cannot be tamed. Satan thought he can play these games, But the Father roars and shakes His mane, and Sin is gone, it has been defeated.
Lust, Hate, Coveting. Fighting the Devil for the purity of my soul. TV, Music, Books. Lust is made easy for a 17-year-old girl.
Shame Brought on by ourselves In this sin-filled world We delve The wretched Fallen Angel Seeks to devour and continues To mangle BUT You Could always see And for those who believe
It was never my intent to return to this place dark halls of betrayal, and lacking in grace Lustful intentions, like geysers of steam scald memories ‘neath mahogany beams
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