Suicide Awareness
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Why is our youth becoming angels?
I’m losing them left and right,
This is an urgent fight,
To have a future that’s bright,
they say they wish you were here.
that they wish they could see your smile
that if God were to give them one final thing in life,
if a genie were to grant one last wish,
On a night where the stars greet thousands of miles just to lift your head
and the earth shifts to meet the steady shuffle of feet with her soft grass bed,
1 He sits on his counter, Advil in hand
(8 he hopes it will kill him;
0 he hopes they'll understand...
0) he swallows what he's holding,
2 and hopes the lights will dim,
7 there's too much he can't endure
Every night a little girl faces a different battle.
She's questioning her worth and what her family would do without her;
Contemplates to run away but her spirit tells her to stay;
We overcome obstacles everyday
They make us view things differently from yesterday
Overcoming an obstacle, takes us a step closer to being wiser
But when you go through an obstacle that makes you full of guilt
The girl
Was all alone
She cried inside
And hid behind
Her tears that
Blinded her
Everyday, people are wanting to die.
Everyday, many people try.
Few are successful,
Others are not.
All of this is dreadful.
Why is none of this taught?
Everyday, people are wanting to die.
Everyday, many people try.
Few are successful,
Others are not.
All of this is dreadful.
Why is none of this taught?
how do you tell someone something so crazy
that you cant see the light at the end of the tunnel
that youre an angel thats just been begging to go home
how do you tell someone something so personal
Relentless driving to another break
Each rest stop another wreck at stake
Driven to the gates
Where the lights shown luminiously
Road to all fates
Take away everything painlessly
While it's easier to cut butter
I'd rather slice open my arm
Because the pain is like no other
and it lessens my alarm.
And when the doctor finds the marks,
I'll just say I fell in the dark.
My lungs failed.
My mind fogged.
The tears stopped flowing,
For I was dead.
My heart ceased.
My body trembled.
I could no longer feel the rain,
For I was dead.
She was the moon.
I yearned to hold her.
My fingertips stopped just before reaching the cold wet surface.
Tears filled my eyes for I could only see her reflection.
Never again could I feel her cool embrace.
i'm telling you now
about a girl who lived some how
she lived through death, she lived through fear,
and in some way she managed to hear
the sound of music, the sound of joy,
Some nights I wake
to the realization
that I can’t remember
what your voice sounds like.
I can’t remember
the curve of your lips
breathethat's what they tell youbreathewake up andbreathe get dressed andbreathebrush your teeth andbreatheput that mask on andbreathepretend you want to be out of bed and
by Ariel Douglas (18 November 2014)
I knew I was lost when my life spiraled out of control.
I knew I was lost when I no longer wanted to live.
It all started with a purse. A beautiful deep plum crossbody. Embossed with a household name.
Kate Spade.
Do you remember what was true before you let the thoughts consume you?An unrecognizable face in a crowd you’ve allowedTo become a disguise you used to hideEvery bruise, cut, scarThe times you tried.
You see
It wasnt always this way
when the time passed it brought colors
for sometime its only gifted grey
its a mindset they say
trapped in my own behavior
the devil next door
Dear Jonghyun:
For a writer, I’ve never been good at
Real
Letters.
I know no truth.
Fiction is my realm, what I work, what I crave, my root,
Dear Ryan,
Why am I writing to someone dead?
The farthest it'll go is the Stone;
The last remnants I have of you - except your Jacket, of course;
I sleep with it, but it no longer smells of you -
To you, I gave the world,
Yet to I, you saw no such need.
Under the worst of circumstances, we met,
I, being a mess bent on self-destruction, and you, a loner.
To you, I gave you my world,
To you, I gave the world,
Yet to I, you saw no such need.
Under the worst of circumstances, we met,
I, being a mess bent on self-destruction, and you, a loner.
To you, I gave you my world,
My eyes count the striped white lines
In the middle of the street.
I speed and the lines zoom by faster.
Making my eyes shake
Back
And Forth.
Unable to count anymore,
They become a solid line.
Trapped, feeling of emotions that you cannot express. Time breaks down. You see yourself as unwanted flesh that's slowly decomposing into nothingness. If I were to disappear would anyone truly notice?
Once upon a time,
a girl lived all alone.
Wanting to explore the world but did not know where to go.
She tried the rainforest, and the sea,
but that was not where she wanted to be.
All the dark colors,
Bind me to the ground,
Trapped with the memories
I hate and fear the most.
Burn me to ashes,
And when the wind blows,
My death is everywhere.
All the dark colors,
Life is rough. Some people love you, some people hate you. The thing is, those who hate you, always hate you. Those who love you though, aren’t always that nice. Confusion clouds the minds of those around me.
i'm sorry i was the disappointment i'm sorry i could never figure my shit outi'm sorry i was such an embarrassment i'm sorry i can't fix myselfi'm sorry i'm the reason for your paini'm sorry i thought i matter i'm sorry i thought i could do someth
Like a little kid
When the lights go out
My soul is dark and scary
This there is no doubt
My brain wages a war it cannot face
You told me once that you were fine
I told myself you were right, you’d never lie
I know now where i went wrong
Seeing you today was the reminder you are gone
When I was 5, I stood with my hand on my heart and recited words I didn’t understand-the pledge of allegiance-to a country that threatened to deport my best friend and their family.
Just because they smile doesn't mean they're happy
Cause when you look away, it fades away sadly
When they say they're okay, don't think that they're fine
Cause containing suffering is best done through lies
You Can't see the Noose
Coming 10,
Had some friends
Had to learn
No bad ends
Coming 12,
Hello World
Oh so broken
Little Girl
Fourteen,
The pain and agony you feel
Oh I know it's all so real
I've been there just like you
Feeling like you can't push through
Hearts
Something you are given at birth
A sense of love, happiness
Sadness, pain and family
A beautiful yet treacherous
The last time the leaves turned orange
I didn’t take notice
Because I was too busy being sad
And crying myself to sleep at night
And wondering why
I am depressed In this messThat I carved my life into,Into this dark abyssWhere I miss The stars zooming around my faceMusic hurrying up their pace
Drawing
Drawing myself
From the inside out
Sheltered by bone,
Veiled in
Cream colored Flesh,
My hand holds my pencil
I lost myself today,
I just turned and ran away.
The sunny day turned to rain.
With the music playing in my head,
I looked for myself within the depths.
I found myself in yesterday,
You were the one who always asked if I was alright, but you were the who was dying inside. You were the one who laughed in the face of fear, I was so proud when you told me you'd been clean for four years.
She talked to no one
knowing herself
wrongs
nights alone
She hid behind herself
Oversized clothes
Floor-length hair.
You would think someone noticed
They did.
No one says a thing.
On Monday, she’s weary, teary, and unsure. She is sure that she’ll be able to fake a smile, but unsure if her friends and family will know it’s fake.
Writers suffer from a chronic parasite; it is called writers block.
They are discouraged yearly from writing due to the failure of the workshops.
One cut, Two cuts,
Three cuts, Four,
C'mon honey,
Whats one more?
Five cuts, Six cuts,
Seven cuts, Eight,
Want some dinner?
"I already ate".
Nine cuts, Ten cuts,
Tick-Tock,
Goes the clock.
Tick-Tock,
It doesn't stop.
Tick-Tock,
Time is running out.
Tick-Tock,
The little girl cries.
Tick-tock,
you hear the wind breezing through the forest around you
and the crickets chirping almost mournfully in déja vu
finally you hear a horn screaming
.No Assurance.
Scatterbrained,
I think of the shame,
Continually tied to my name,
I take the burden of the blame.
I was leery once,
and you took my trust,
.No Assurance.
Scatterbrained,
I think of the shame,
Continually tied to my name,
I take the burden of the blame.
I was leery once,
I do not wish to stare
Out of this Plexiglass window that shouts my name, taunts me.
Yet it refuses
To let me leave this world.
My trembling, tired fingers
Reach for some source of life--
The men march on ceaselessly into battle;Rifles strapped,Boots cleaned meticulously,Trained for the unknown war.
i remember what it felt liketo feel.
when red was aheart, still beating,and blue was your eyes,not the color of the wavesholding me under,pushing me under,helpless.
PURPOSE.
WHEN IT DISAPPEARS IT DRIVES YOU INTO WINDING, DARK ROADS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
THEN SLYLY WHISPERS IN YOUR EAR TO MAKE YOU THINK EVERYTHING IS ALRIGHT.
Her wide smile,
And those bright, sparkling eyes
Hid so much hurt and pain.
She smiled all day,
Then butchered her skin at night.
She appeared so joyful, so happy,
But she was breaking down.
Shadows,
Dark, cold spots in a ray of sun.
Shadows hide things,
Hide secrets.
You look at me,
You see a bright, smiling, happy person.
But it's only a wall,
And that wall,
We are the same,
Both you and me,
We both like to draw,
Pictures on our skin.
But we lie to each other,
Hiding our secrets,
Scared of judgement,
Becuse we might have gone too far.
I met a boy who liked to draw,
But he wasn't like other artists,
His skin was his canvas,
And his paintbrush;
A blade.
He hid his drawings,
Underneath bracelets and sweaters,
Some days I long to be like the ocean
Gently drifting in a world of deep blue
And exotic life forms.
The crest of my waves protect me from the terrors of hate
And even at low tide
I am still loved.
Like anger
The alcohol courses through my blood
Whispering sweet nothings to a deaf ear
Promising better tomorrow's
And more beautiful tragedies.
There is no rhyme or reason
To the fury in our souls
Why does it matter
Why does it matter that I can’t sleep
Why does it matter that I can’t eat
Why does it matter?
Does it mean I’m less of a human being
If I can’t see what everyone else is seeing
She runs away to hide
nobody giving her a second glance
so no one sees her cry
why can't they give her another chance
Broken girl all alone
locked away in her room
putting on her headphones
My alarm clock rings
Little does it know i don't dream
Nor do I sleep
I'm way too busy
Attempting to escape my misery
I'm trapped
The only way out is dismay
Between school and home
i'm the new kid on the block
the new kid on the street
trying to get along
trying to make end's meet
sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me, yeah right.
Pushes and punches, teases and screamsNo one ever wanted to listen.No one ever wanted to really see.
She gripped it- cold and silver.
Sharp, stinging to the touch.
Bite your lips; your words are robbery.
You try to destroy anyone with a basilisk’s glare.
Do you grin inside? You’re killing me.
ITS SAD BECAUSE OF NOT USING COMMON SENSE
EVERY TWENTY FOUR HOURS A PERSON DIES
WHY
*.SCREAMS* WHY
Opening the balcony door
The wind gushes, whipping thru my hair
My ball grown beautifully swaying
My heart pounding, what are you saying?
Looking out over the terrace
Down at the lights of Paris
One cut
That's all it takes.
For the addiction to start.
Five years have passed.
The collection of scars has grown.
It's only gotten worse.
Nobody sees it.
Nobody helps.
The black clouds swirl overhead,
Angrily moaning and shrieking
As it swirls around, utterly in chaos.
The black waater of the oceam below swirls too,
A vicious vortex, always spiraling down
That night in April was the worst night of my life.
Oh here she goes again
Blades weren't helping
There were no more tears to cry
You don’t know my name.
Tell me now.
Why are we sharing the same tears?
I stare in your face,
Yet I remain invisible.
I sit in the white porcelain, writing.
I allow red to drip, making roses on the snowy surface
I feel:
Relief. As if every weight I have ever felt has been lifted.
Mommy, Daddy, this is not your fault.
I once heard taking your own life
is a selfish thing
but now think asking someone
to live when they no longer want to
is even more selfish.
I threw white towels over my mirrors in 2011:
Suicide
Doesn't always look like
A girl dressed in all black
With thick black makeup
And scars all over her arms
Sometimes
Suicide
Looks like
Someone who's always laughing
I wake up, put on my clothes,
wash my face, fix my hair and look in the mirror with disgust.
Yes, I'll do it.
I go to school and walk to class,
I can hear them behind me, laughing,
All alone, trapped inside a hole that only I fit inside
Gasping as the blade touches flesh, the blood suffocating me
Rising higher and higher not to lower like a tide,
Thats when one knows they're dying
when i was a younger soul,
i let a man destroy me
i had closed my eyes, crossed my fingers
and fell hopelessly for the devil
because his words were like music
and when he left for the first time
The stars beat in your heart
A galaxy contained in your little frame
Your eyes are always full
I walk through the halls everyday and school,
as kids continually knock the books out of my hands, and try to trip me.
God, I lie under this towering oak,
The whole of nature at peace in this silent still shot,
In the frigid November,
Utterly confused.
A year ago,
The yearn for love
The learn for someone to have hope in you
The yearn to receive love back
The yearn to mean the world to someone
The yearn to become someone
The yearn to have a stable home
2000 chances were handed out
in hopes that they would never be used
the number on the cards and people waiting
for just one call to come in confused
2000 pieces of hope were believed in
Let her eyes scan the fall
The wind blowing through her hair
She hears it now
All the words that were whispered
Behind her back
Words on how she was wrong
How she could never be right
Hidden in her lonely heart,is a piece of her that shall part.The brokeness of her soul,Shattered like glass,
When someone says death, it is taken with fright,
an end, a finish, a darkness to light.
When I think of death, sure, it scares me a bit,
but I see all I can do, and that fear takes a hit.
Though we view...
View?
A saddened pain
A hope to no good
A god of sin...
We still view...
Power, strength
She had us sung
We could not behold
The tears of shade...
It has been a year today,
And I don't know what to say
I think about you everyday;
That "missing something" feeling hasn't gone away.
This fake smile is bone structure
Painted on to mask my frown
You don't see fear nor pain or sin,
I'm a suicidal clown.
Blood seeped through my long sleeve as I prepared my noose of
belts and sheets. I'm
An old man watches,
A baby cries,
But neither one,
Will meet my eyes.
An enemy laughs,
And old friends greet,
But I just carry on,
Staring down at my feet.
Society screams a moaning cry
Emotional individuals die
Shootings, murders, texting, driving, death
sooner, later, nothing will be left
innocent children breathe their final breath
She thought she was pretty until society told her she was worthless.
She didn’t fit the description of beauty,
All because she was different.
Bleeding wrists
drip
drop
Broken neck, rugged rope
creak
croak
A shot in the night
Bang
thud
Blood all around
Laying down with tears in her eyes
She gets up with that knife knowing what it can do
She is sad,not even,depressed enough to feel she is not worth it
A waist of space, a no good nothing
There was a time when she was little
And her brother would call her names.
But she didn’t believe them because she loved herself
And thought they were all lies.
If I could kiss every malady from the cells on your heart
And the neurons in your brains
Then my mouth would turn red and bloody raw
Because I would not stop until all were healed.
He was constantly feeling down, especially when no one was around.
The salty tears
trickling down her face
These numerous times
can't be erased
The words that have been said
Bitch, slut, ugly, fat
Would you laugh at that?
Would you follow the others
They are the building blocks of intelligence,
And yet they are still used to tear down others.
Slut, Whore, Skank: Harsh insults are not relevant?
Tell that to the lifeless bullied girl's mother.
Filthy hands shine in the light of the beautiful pain.
Glistening in the promise sin offers to gratify the mind’s desires.
Relief from the pain in frozen blood cries out.
Trembling.
“My dear little girl, what do you fear?
My princess, why are you scared?”
“I am scared of the world, is it not clear?
I am simply unprepared.”
“My dear little girl, what do you fear?
Looking in the mirror I see a girl...
I'm watching her scream
I'm rewinding her dreams
I'm watching her cry
I'm practically watching her die
I sit back and watch as she tries to wipe the tears from her eyes.
We see them every day,
But never see them crying.
We claim to care about them,
But underneath, are lying.
We shun, we tease, we taunt them
As if death didn't matter.
The name calling.
The pointing.
The laughing.
It's a burden I quietly bear.
I see it happen to other students
Every.
Single.
Day.
You're fat,
You're ugly,
These shadows...
They do speak...
They speak to my mind,
Oh they speak, how they speak!
I know that they aren't real...
But their presence is known,
By the hair on my neck,
The day is cloudy, no man in sight.
Not even the crows who cry in flight.
She looks up and she looks down, but no salvation is to be found.
You know that girl who's always smiling?
The one that laughs at everyone's jokes?
Can you tell on the inside she is dying?
A pain that even Hell can't invoke.
It is because she is different.
I feel my pulse throb in my fingers,
Watch as the smoke dances between my swollen digits,
But my head is lost in a haze.
Take another hit, try to fly away,
To rest in the sky for a while,
one last desperate plea, one last call for helping handsto give him reason, give him ground on which to standhe could hardly tell, as he glanced around the room
You think you know fear?
Demons, ghosts, and possessions?
You know nothing of fear.
Fear is hearing the click from the other end of the phone,
When your best friend just admitted to swallowing the pills.
My life was changed by your decision.
And I can't help but wonder if you'd known my face
Would your gun have turned away in disgrace?
Would the butt have become like jelly in your hands?
The mind is never a wasteland
And even without a helping hand
The ultimate defense is to withstand
And for happiness to be a demand.
This is the youth of our nation
Eagerly seeking salvation
Your body's getting cold, your lips are turning blue. why did you do it? you're the only one who knew, I see the earth below like the pillow on your bed, no ropes no guns you overdose instead.
Holding her hand like you’ll never let go
With trees and leaves and lilac scent
The sky with clouds you’ll never know
And rains you never knew you meant
"I was here long before it became a hotel
All the memories this building holds...
I knew these walls and these corridors well,
But this country's grown up, while I've just grown old...
Take me away from here.
Take all my fears and let me watch them disappear.
You better hurry.
Take all the unnatural scars on my body and recreate them into untouched skin.
How is perfection defined,
with collarbones?
or a gap between my thighs?
Perfection is all we see.
because images of beauty
reflect our insecurities.
Perfection is in my reach,
Anger. Hatred. Jealousy. Tears. Happiness. Joy. Glee.
For all the emotions the world throws at me, I write.
I write when I sit in a class that's getting too hard.
What is this I'm doing?
Falling from a building?
Left and right building move swiftly around me...
Below the hard surface 3....2....1...
Close my eyes hope to die...
Splat...or so I would have thought...
I met a man and his name was Mr. Lonely
How did I know? Because he told me
He kept asking me to make it stop
I asked him what he meant, but he said he couldn't tell me
DOES ANYTHING MATTER ANYMORE
DOES IT MATTER THAT WHEN YOU'RE DOING GOOD
ONE LITTLE INDISCREPANCY CAN CHANGE YOUR WHOLE LIFESTYLE
every so often
they flood us with statistics
38,000 a year
150 a day.
1 every 15 minutes.
faceless numbers
do we forget that
she had friends
and a family
and a future
I wonder on what's fallen beneath me
Will never return, but still it consumes me.
Gone forever, and forever lives on
This memory will stay for all MY eternity.
Falling slowly as time does pass
All my problems seem to amass
Into some great raging abomination
Overtaking me with dark sensation
To tell me who I am,
Is to waste your needless breath.
My youth is evidence,
To fit in
In the end
Will make you fit out.
The struggle of peer pressure.
Suicide! Suicide! Suicide!
What would you do if I wasn't here?
Would half of you shed a tear?
You think you know me
Can you can tell everything I'll ever be
Think you can tell who I am.
You say things to tear me down
What would you do if I wasn't here?
Would half of you shed a tear?
You think you know me
Can you can tell everything I'll ever be
Think you can tell who I am.
You say things to tear me down
Why?
That’s all I ask,
Why?
Is there something wrong with me?
Did someone tell you all to do this?
Or is this just some sick, twisted game?
I cant take it anymore!
Any place and every place I'm mocked, bullied, and abused,
every step I take is pure pain,
and every breath is that much longer with this horrid pain.
Peace is something I've never known,
Dark salt water drips on lined paper
A shaky hand scribbles
Dear mom_
Stops_ heaves a sigh
Purple and blue color his face
His body
Pain
Crippling
Silent screams pour into his mind
