ADHD
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Tapping, Tapping
my foot like an engine
tap, tap, tapping at the floor
like a woodpecker
Running, Running
my mind is running
and I'm on a treadmill
trying to catch up,
Running running running and running
my mind is always running.
Yet I stand almost still.
Tap tap tap
my foot won't stop tapping against the floor.
What was my last thought?
Where am I?
Peter Piper Picked a Pair of Pills to Pop
Just to see what they’d do to him
He Popped a cocktail stocked with
Adderall, Buspar, Benzos and Zoloft-
Cant you hear it?there is musicfrom behind the walls.whimsical windits callingbegginglisten listen listen
My life choices are "Selections" that are just "Reflections" of my ADHDs over "Erections", So please educate yourself before our "Disconnection", Your common sense is our self-"Deception", My minds is so unique it needs your "Protection", My mind
Sometimes my brain kicks on overdrive
Running in circles and swirls and lines
Antsy with thoughts I can't place racing by
I can only conclude that I won’t be fine.
One such day I took a walk
How can I rhyme the words in my head
When my medication keeps my creativity dead
It suppresses my mind and artistic creation
Right and left brain have no correlation
My inner child wants to frolick and play
For a very long time I looked down on myself
for pursuing my dreams instead of the wealth
My brother, an engineer
My sister, a nurse
And I...
I am...
not the lawyer you wanted to see
I love you
Yes, I love you immensely but
the inevitable
is inevitable
Everyone gets bored.
People like you and me,
get bored so easily.
The most exciting people to me
Sometimes, I think it would be nice to peel off my skin in strips like string cheese.
Sometimes, I think it would be cool to be frozen solid like a Popsicle.
Growing up a good girl with a bad brain is strange.
Dear Fellow Peers,
Criticism is a hot knife to my heart
And a chokehold on my soul.
I wish I were overreacting.
I wish I were "dramatic"
Or that I just "wanted attention".
I thought I was alright and I was okay
But, let me tell you what I want to say
I heard I was restless and had low concentration
It was all true then I came to the realization
I was insane and needed medication
School has a bill that is required by all to fit into it.
Its like trying to put a triangle into the circular hole.
It just won't fit.
I am a triangle, because I don't fit into the catagory of the circle.
Everyday bouncing around in the mind and bodyNever have a boring day, a constant state of hyperTo have thoughts replay over and overThe meds offer no help they cause only depression
Blaring static from 59 T.V. sets.
Lost in a sensory sea, never to return.
Memory, cognition, sight, sound, taste.
A knock on the door, words seeping through wood.
I cannot hear them, what are the saying?
I’m no poet.
I’m a girl with ADHD
trying to type something meaningful.
Rarely,
no direct meaning ever happens.
At least,
not to the outside world.
But to me
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.
A disorder they called it, haha.
More like a misnomer.
I wonder what they think when I tell them.
Some go - that makes sense, others I couldn't tell.
To be honest……
The most amazing thing I could say about myself is….
Okay! I see you’re impatient but I love the suspense!
The fact that I have ADHD completely rocks my socks.
Hey, You!
Sitting, struggling, struggling to be sitting
still.
Fidgeting and squirming in the seat but
No. Knows standing,
Standing is worse. Because standing
ADD
ADHD
OCD
BPD
PTSD
Depression
Anxiety
Dementia
You may think I'm just listing mental disorders
And I sort of am.
These disorders have one connection.
Me.
I have attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder - inattentive subtype
a.k.a. ADD
which means
my mind works differently from most
I travel by train and I look out
My window, my legs are too close to the grey-man beside me
Headphones in, power chords, progressions
I am progressing, and my knees
Need a shave; they catch on the silk of his suit.
My thoughts scatter as my body
swells in its confinement
i feel i am coming apart
As if each part of me repels all others
am breaking
Away, my parts moving of their own volition
I once knew a kidHe was joyous, excited, and niceHe was not at all timidPositive emotions, he could entice
A girl who bounces off the walls.
Doesn't remenber to make important calls.
Has a hard time focusing on a task.
Doesn't repersent who she is, laughing at herself is her mask.
By Moira ledinsky
He’s a robot
A zombie
Just empty and numb
Eyes vacant and glossy
Mouth quiet and dumb.
His hands are still
So they reached their goal.
The meds sat him down
They don't really know who I am,
They only see what I choose to show them,
You guys don't know I'm secretly a fem,
I do the dirty for that green,
But men are just so mean,
I am now a lesbian.
I have a beast inside of me,
I know not from whence it came;
But however I obtained this curse,
From it, I can never be set free.
It whispers to me day and night,
Distracts me, never sleeping.
I'm sitting down with my books, about to study.
I tell myself I've got this, I tell myself I'm ready.
I believe in myself, so does my mom,
Tells me I'm a winner, I've got to keep calm.
Getting my Kendrick Lamar on.
But i ain't Swimming Pools, wishing I had
Money Trees and Poetic Justice braids in my head.
Close your eyes
dream
Open your eyes
live.
A dream,
it can be the start
of a life long adventure.
Some people dream
and just let it be.
Some people dream
and set their dreams free.
Disorder
I have ADHD
And ADD
And OCD
And a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,I,j,k,l,m,n,o,p,o,p,o,p,
Oh my God I'm doing it again,
That was so fun!
Where did you see it,
It ran off just moments ago,
I really wish it wouldn't flit.
and unfortunately it isn't slow
Is it down the street?
Through the park?
On the bus seat?
Hiding in the dark?
Fuck first semester
And financial aid and scholarship applications and just money in general.
And the 3.5 I needed if I wanted to come back.
And my parents.
And money
And society for revolving around money
The principal brought me into his office. I was a bad student for a day.
I spent my time there in awkward silence as the principle took me through the actions today.
Normal is all I want to be.
Normal is what they say I am.
But Normal is not what I am.
They say, I am Normal.
Who calls being hyper,
Normal?
Who calls being distracted,
Normal?
This really sucks.
But it's so cool at the same time.
It's hard.
But I'm making progress!
I wish I were normal.
I'm smart enough to learn.
I'll let obsession be passion.
Teacher, before we start the dramatics,
Before the sighs begin.
I would like for you to know
about what really happens within.
Yes, sir; the problem IS written clearly on the board.
Power lines have fallen, scattered into several sections
Sparks are flying in all directions
Data caught in the crossfires of my mind
Battling against the original design
Opportunities passing by
Do drugs make faces lie?
Does liquor deepen the hole?
Cut once to fill it.
When mirrors break,
glue can only dull shards.
Hair wavy ripples
teal tinted aqua
skin supple
hubble bubble nipples
cripples bystanders even when fully sheathed
Sweat drips and drops and plops beneath
the penholder quivers at sweet nostalgia
Stay silent
Sit straight
Perfect hair
Perfect teeth
Perfect breast
Perfect house
Perfect parents
Perfect! Perfect! Perfect!
When it began, no one could tell
How hard it was for me
I was just like the other boys and girls
Just with more energy
I am ADHD
Can't you see
I am here
I am weird
I am loud
I am proud
I have racing thoughts
I have lots and lots
I talk and talk
I walk and walk
I can't sit still
