11 years facts

Money ,

Cash a check , 

Stack money , 

Keep a safe , 

Don’t tell nobody shit , 

Don’t vent to everybody that’s willing to listen, 

Don’t change up on your bitch for a quick nut , 

Don’t nobody love you when you doing bad , 

Don’t nobody care until you in the grave , 

Don’t nobody care until you on your back , 

They rather show up & show out with you not breathing , 

Shit be weird, 

10 years ago you couldn’t be gay now you can , 

10 years ago we got beat ,

10 years ago we got buddied , 

It’s funny how things change ,

But nothing really change because I been going some things , 

& it’s hard to ease the pain , 

People been calling me crazy once I start speaking my mind , 

Or when I started asking questions, 

See when I was out there on the block , 

Y’all was telling me to do better , 

Now 11 years later I’m on my grind , 

My back still against the wall , 

The ones close to me showed their true colors, 

The ones I loved the most truned out to be snakes , 

I knew them for so long that I missed all the Signs , 

Cause I was choosing history over loyalty,

Snakes over real , 

Picking all the wrong friends ,

Not speaking my mind , 

Not standing up for myself , 

Things happen to me as a child & im still paying for it to this day , 

I suffer from depression, 

I suffer from PTSD, 

I suffer from the child in me , 

I wish I could have done more for the 13 year old me , 

Wish I was in control for the 14 old me , 

When I found out I was pregnant that was the 1st day of hell , 

14 years old having a kid already that shit wasn’t cool to me , 

That shit wasn’t cute to me ,

That shit wasn’t easy for me , 

That shit was not okay , 

Rape is not okay , 

I don’t care who it happens to or had happened to me ,

This shit is not right , 

It fucks people up in the head like me , 

It destroyed good people like me , 

It’s hard to trust people , 

So I pushed everybody away , 

Especially the ones that say they love me the most , 

If someone to kind to me I think they out to get me , 

If a niqqa show me love he trynna line me ,

If a bitch called me her friend I watch her like a hulk , 

I’m on everything & everybody, 

Don’t nothing gets pass me , 

I play blind , 

I acted dumb , 

I play you from a distance,

Nobody getting close , 

Soon as I feel like you to close I start questioning your loyalty,

Once I love you it’s war over you ,

Once I walk away I’m done with you ,

Once I stop answering you calls & blocking you I’m over you , 

11 years of tears for what ,

11 years