11.15.23

did I speak too softly?
did I laugh too deeply?
breathe too loudly?

were you too cold - the way that I was too cold? were you searching for warmth in my ribcage? I’m covered in frostbite.
I can’t stop shivering.

is my hair too long? did you wrap it around your fingers too tightly? It must’ve hurt. my shirt is tinged in red, the stains won’t wash out.
I can’t look at myself.

were my hands too soft pushing you away? I must’ve forgot to tell you that I’m not very strong. I guess you wanted to figure it out for yourself.  
I can’t stop ripping the skin off my bones.

did you look too far into my eyes and drown?  were you suffocating enough to forget who I was? is my fear that forgettable? could you not breathe after extinguishing the fire i built to warm myself?
smoke inhalation can be deadly. -

while you survived, I’m still in a coma.
I want to disappear.

“I fell in love with you while you were terrified”