2 am thoughts

Tossing and turning till I fall asleep
Counting and shifting till I be at peace
Drawing and reading till I can finally breathe
But none of those things work anymore

Doing homework until 3 am
Being on my phone till 6 pm
Waiting for his text at infinity time
But he is never texting back

Thinking about what I’m doing wrong
Making myself think that I’m at fault
Finally realizing that it’s only for half of it
Oh wait, it’s now 5 am

Being all alone with nowhere to go
Crying for no one at bed some more
Telling myself I don’t need him no more
Crawling back into his arms again

He only calls when he needs advice
Complaining about his bad life
Sometimes asks me “how is life”
And just goes straight to bed

Sometimes he forgets that I’m human too
That I have a life with problems too
It’s like he doesn’t care about me at all
Wait he actually does not

I have to carry two ships on my back
No wait three no four
Maybe even five or six
I lost count after 10

Counting over merchandise to make sure things are set
Keeping track of whose problem it is
I need to be careful to not mix them up
But wait, I already have