726 Days

726 days until I’m gone

Like a Leaf from a tree

Or a bird from a nest

I’ll be leaving home

Moving on from the past

I’ll be moving on from the moving

From one house to another

From week to week

Or month to month

From a life I created

Only to move and create again

From packing and unpacking

And finally just leaving things

In a box

From wondering when

The next move is

726 days

I’ll be moving from not having

Anyone to talk to

For the first fourteen years of my life

From not having a true friend

Or someone’s shoulder to lean on

From not having

Not knowing

What family truly is

From the cold un-functional life

I have lived for fourteen years

Until I finally saw

The truth

I’ll be moving from all the bruises

Ones that have covered

My arms, my shoulders

My legs and my back

From all the hand marks

That has landed on my face

And the scares on my heart

From the wounds deep inside

From being told

How useless and horrid I am

To see, and the shame

I remind them of

Being said I was a mistake

One that should be forgotten

From being told I will become

Nothing and believing it all

726 days

Until I will be leaving the ones

Who bring up memories

I would soon like to have left alone

From being reminded and reliving the experience

Through my nightmares

Nightmares where I see the evil in there eyes

The horrible smell of their breath

The press of their weight on me

My tears running down my face

Their fingers

And their bodies

Tearing my insides apart

Violating me

As no child should ever be violated

Over, and over again like its happening again

I’ll be moving from two little kids

Who I have raised

Who I have taken care of

Feeding and protecting them

And although I may miss them

I will be letting

Them making their own decision

Whether to stay

Or come with me

726 days

Until I leave that life

And walk into another

Where I can finally settle in

With a friend

Who has showed me true friendship

Who has listened and helped me

With my past

Who has reserved judgment

And shown only kindness and friendship

To move in with her family

With open arms and a smile on their faces

Time and time again

And treated me like their own

Who has shown me what family is

Who I can never tell how grateful I am

No matter how I try

I’ll be moving in

726 days…..