78

78 I never thought you could change. You're 78. You're stuck in many of your ways, but one day you changed, it all started with a girl named Emily. Seventh grade, my first ever crush on someone that I couldn't shake or ignore.  She was the most eye appealing person I had ever met. Her expression hard, but smile soft, her hair gelled just right, her body slim, her kindness shining though the hard shell she put on. I saw her and my heart stopped. But I couldn't tell you that because she was a girl and not a guy like you had always wanted. 78 years of the same ways. This girl, Emily she was my age, her best friend was my best friend but we didn't really know each other. We spent a year together but never talked. And then every one of our other friends in our group graduated. We were left to fend for ourselves. Just the two of us. I didn't know her and she didn't know me. We were like summer and winter, like oil and water,so close but never intertwining, and never connecting. Then one day we did. It just clicked. She was my best friend and I was hers. My feelings for her grew over the next 2 years and eventually I couldn't keep it in anymore. I came home crying one day and you looked at me and asked if I was okay. I said no daddy, I think I'm gay. What I heard next was what I expected. You said "well honey it's just a phase you will be okay." But through two abusive boyfriends and two more years, I realized that you were wrong. I liked girls and I knew that for sure. So I tried coming out to you again. This time was pretty much the same reaction. But after long talks and arguments and lots of strong words from both of us, you came up with this conclusion. It was okay to be gay. I remember the day like it was yesterday, though it was 2 months ago. You were walking me up to the door to the place that I live and you stopped me on the path and said listen "I love you and you know that, and if you want to marry a girl, I'm okay with that." I started crying and I looked at you and I said "so does that mean you will come to my wedding even if it's a girl?" And you said "of course"78 years of the same thing, the same strong thoughts, then you changed. You changed for me.  

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

deardiaryimalive

Wow... this is actually amazing. 

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