the aches of modern day

Everything hurts so much more 

knowing that I have nobody

     that nobody wants me

     that I will never be first choice'

     that I sucessfully drifted into failure

     that as lonely as quarantine is, it's all the same every other day

Everythings aches so much more

closing my eyes as the hours turn

       as each day feels longer than the last

       as each moment lingers to taunt me

       as each second drags it claws down my wretched mentality

       as each thought blurs behind my eyelids, as I slowly go insane

I don't know what I'm doing or Why I am like this

I wish I could change

the pain in my chest

but it stays like no one else would