Addicted

Mom wont you hold my hand Come on, put down the bottle instead please wont you just hold meMa , Im lonely There are  days i wish i could make you feel how loved you are like them pills  once had  There sre days i  tortured my self  mentally just trying to understand youAs a child i only wanted you and i hadnt even got to know you yet20 years have passed and i still feel like i dont know youI see the love youve left behindI see pain and secrets in your eyes trapped behind that broken smileI see the love trapped way down beneath youI see the women you could have beenI wish you could be the mother you so desperatly tried to bePeople change and ive learned that from you. Ive seen you break in tearsIve seen you about to end it all in a mess of tears Ive seen you beg for mercey and beg for love Before i realized how strong you were and how alone you were i felt lostI felt like i was begging you to love meBegging you to put me first I was jelous of the world and people around me and afraid I felt alone.I didnt realize howmuch you loved me for so longYou just didnt love your self.I wish i could give you the world someday for all you’ve enduredTo cherish the nights youd play with my hair while i slept To go back one more time to the nights id fake asleep to listen to your voice To hear you apologive for the storm you created and listen to your stories of your childhoodTo tell you its okay and make it realYou my beautiful mother deserve so much moreYou deserve the love you try to give the worldI wish i could take back the days i didnt understandIts been a journey watching you grow as  i haveI wish i could make things right but youve taught me how to recover You gave me strengh through the storms you enduredOne day i hope you get to experice being addicted to self loveOne day i dream you get justice for the wreckage youve wheathered  

This poem is about: 
Me
My family

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