Addicted
Mom wont you hold my hand
Come on, put down the bottle instead
please wont you just hold me
Ma , Im lonely
There are days i wish i could make you feel how loved you are like them pills once had
There sre days i tortured my self mentally just trying to understand you
As a child i only wanted you and i hadnt even got to know you yet
20 years have passed and i still feel like i dont know you
I see the love youve left behind
I see pain and secrets in your eyes trapped behind that broken smile
I see the love trapped way down beneath you
I see the women you could have been
I wish you could be the mother you so desperatly tried to be
People change and ive learned that from you.
Ive seen you break in tears
Ive seen you about to end it all in a mess of tears
Ive seen you beg for mercey and beg for love
Before i realized how strong you were and how alone you were i felt lost
I felt like i was begging you to love me
Begging you to put me first
I was jelous of the world and people around me and afraid
I felt alone.
I didnt realize howmuch you loved me for so long
You just didnt love your self.
I wish i could give you the world someday for all you’ve endured
To cherish the nights youd play with my hair while i slept
To go back one more time to the nights id fake asleep to listen to your voice
To hear you apologive for the storm you created and listen to your stories of your childhood
To tell you its okay and make it real
You my beautiful mother deserve so much more
You deserve the love you try to give the world
I wish i could take back the days i didnt understand
Its been a journey watching you grow as i have
I wish i could make things right but youve taught me how to recover
You gave me strengh through the storms you endured
One day i hope you get to experice being addicted to self love
One day i dream you get justice for the wreckage youve wheathered
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