Aftermath

It’s the kind of grief

That hurts all over,

A tight ball in your chest

That loosens with each sob.

But the sobs never stop

And neither does the pain

That encompasses your body

Because that pain is wrapped in anger,

And a fear that cannot be expressed

You are hardly aware of it

Until that ball threatens to suffocate you,

As you’re curled up in bed

Or on the floor,

Wherever your body happened to land,

Sobbing

Wondering

Why it hurts so much,

What could possibly be wrong

When you’re hating yourself

For letting him

Do this

To you.

He walks around happy,

Whistling.

You walk around scared,

Dying a little with each step

But smiling the whole time

They don’t know how you feel

You are hardly aware of it

Until that ball chokes you off,

Threatens to take you away

And you lie there sobbing

Wondering

Why the sobs never stop

It’s that kind of grief

That encompasses your whole body