On-again, Off-again, Pen Pals

Dear Success,

The other day, I remembered,

When we first became

More than acquainted.

I started talking to you,

Kind of by accident.

You were popular and cool,

Like, everyone was your friend

Well, except me; I wasn’t really outstanding

Enough,

And the others seemed to deserve more commending.

Yet - somehow - you wrote me one day

In fifth grade - somehow.

And when the winners were said

I got your words - given to me somehow.

I still don’t know why.

But then your words showed up again,

In the same building, a different room

A longer letter, more divulged

Suddenly, I was no longer holding the broom.

There was a long pause after that.

You didn’t respond after I’d thanked you

In fact, I’d become friends again with failure.

But one day, your words knocked on my door again.

The letter was short;

No apologies, just gifts bought

I didn’t mind

More arrived, and when the letters stopped

A few months later,

I didn’t mind.

The words arrived again

But in a shorter burst,

And I relapsed into failure’s arms

A few months later

one letter arrived from you

Then no more for months.

I fell.

You started sending me more letters a little while ago

But more subtle they were.

It wasn’t the lavish sudden bursts

Of yesteryear; no these were quieter

Yet perhaps the best.

Our words have been brief

Our words have been far and between

Our words have touched each other from afar

But not our fingers.

I’m not asking too much

I’m not asking too much

I really hope I’m not asking too much

But I need to see you just once.

Everyone has seen you,

In all of your glory

But not me

If I’m destined to just your letters,

Yet not your sight,

I may as well not try anymore.

Just tell me.