Ajax's Lament

I know it’s cliché

But really

Loud music, crying and writing helps

At least I have something

At least I can find something

Even if it’s stupid

Dumb Sanctuary

At least I don’t paint my face anymore

Since now it would be all too obvious

That, at heart, all I wanted to do was darken my eyes

So when the black bled

People would care

And they might even stop to ask me-

Why

But that would just be shameful now

I’ve outgrown it

Though there was some strange comfort in knowing

Hey kid-

‘Least ya ain’t alone!

It was fun while it lasted

But I’m too smart now. unfortunately

And I know I ought to be alright

So many say so

But they don’t know

We all have our own battles, after all

And if they can survive theirs-

There’s no reason why I should be so meek and malleable.