All hope lost

I remember us being so close I never doubted you for a second

I knew for a fact that being in your arms was like heaven

then my grandma got sick and I felt as if we became distant

I was barely holding your hand grip was violently ripping

I prayed for you to help her and to keep her home safe

but I guess you had a different plan because Grandma passed away

I was mad at you because I know you could have stopped it

i felt too confused because I wanted to know how could you've cause this

grandma said good thing happen to good people and I swear I was the best

not recognizing that this trail was just a test

I started to abjure from you and I stopped going to your house

because I only went to hear from you and if I go now it would be quiet as a mouse

I some how managed to get to 8th grade where I picked up the habit of sin

I thought that staying on top was the only way to win

it's been a long time now since we had a conversation

thought that you didn't want to hear from me because Ive been living a life like Satan

I almost died trying to stay alive seeing the light made me decide

I was nothing with out you my faith is on the scale 2

and I'm really trying but it seems I can't get closer to you

sometime I want to say why me but I know how much you hate being questioned

and I thought I was already doing enough maybe at the end this will some how be someone else's lesson