To Allison

Upon a bright and shining day

   cold trickles down the spine

A sudden prickling tremor

   may follow the frigid lines.

This is how it may begin,

   the catalyst for loves ruin.

I fear.

Outside our walls

things change.

What of rejection?

Better I take responsibility

than encourage anger at someone else.

Right?

Wrong?

Fear.

Too soon a dismal fog descends

   to dapple skin and cloth.

The cool my flowing blood befriends;

   it travels slow and sloth.

It starts now to take ahold

   judgement befuddled by the cold.

I'm afraid.

How will you be

today?

Will my words bring disdain

upon a friend you've not seen

in months?

Am I too naive for you?

I'll quiet 

I'll hide

You won't know...

Fear.

Thickening fog turns darkest cloud,

   ensconcing me in ice.

My blood can freeze without a sound;

   can frozen heart suffice?

Love is living and can't live

   where, stiff, it is not free to give.

I'm hard

I know I should

feel bad.

Part of me somewhere does

But

it is not stronger

than my fear.

Again and again

it hurts you.

Stopped.

Fear.

Can Eros arrow ever pierce

   a solid frozen heart?

And what can insults ever do

   but chip away a part?

Broken pieces will just be

   a dull throb 'til I'm thawed

I'm shaking.

I cringe to see

our warped friendship

What happened?

Did I not call you

best friend?

Do not I?

Do you?

Fear.

A flash of light, lightning has struck

   cracks circumvent the shell

Shall ice return and I be stuck,

   or shall the warmth now swell?

Yes, indeed love conquers fear,

   but how in this does love appear?

I stand.

I cannot do this

anymore

I'm sorry

isn't the answer.

Let's talk.

Love.