Anxiety

Dear Anxiety,

You evolved to me as stress but continued to be more 

You are so new to me 

I had gone to doctors to make sure I was healthy;

And I was

But physically and mentally healthy are two different things 

And it seems that you were the culprit:

Awareness if not blurry or dark 

Numb, hyperventilating, fast heart rate, trembling legs and hands

Like a Chihuahua trembles from excitement, sure they are from 

emotions going haywire but I wouldn't say this is from excitement;

I couldn't stand in front of a classroom to present or go to the store without

you appearing in the back of my mind as a hazy cloud that comes and goes

To you I say be gone 

But it's all in my head isn't it?

I didn't ask for you and I don't need you, but that's what a mental disorder is 

It comes in many forms and to me you came as this

I take medication for you yet you're still there, I write my feelings down 

and you disappear, yet you reappear the next day or week

I shouldn't learn to cope with you, I should learn how to over come you 

and I will

                                                   Sincerely,

                                        your host, Nancy Velasquez