on the edge of dexterity and ineptness.
my heartbeat couldn't decide whether it wanted beat into an oblivion
or just stop all together.
my mind was split in two.
i wished to be yin and yang
yet, i could only achieve one.
i wanted to be the bad inside the good
yet, the good inside the bad.
i desired to be the essence of life itself.
i want to be a blazing candle in an abyss
yet, the shadowy oasis in the desert.
i came to the revelation that i was neither
good nor bad,
sick nor health,
light nor dark,
i longed to be voluminous,
capable of swallowing this earth whole,
being the ocean suited to end this world
or let it thrive.
but the physical antonym within my being suggested
i was nothing more than a puddle of muck and acid rain.
yet, i was hungry for power and full of persistency
and thats what frightened me the most.
determination and domination grasped me by the harness
and lead me to heaven or hell,
i couldn't tell
and on my throne
on the edge of harmony and corruption.