Astray's Monologue

You will never meet anyone as easily manipulated as I.

I yearn so for attention that I'd relinquish all I own, even myself to the mercy of others.

This sad existence continues on as I've wandered through life giving myself to one or another person who would have me.

A pitiful life.

Wasted.

I know nothing more than this.

Because I strive after false hopes and vain joys I have been left empty.

My menial and mundane ways brought me only pain and suffering at the hands of others, who I held in highest esteem.

It hurt more so to admit, but truly the fault is not theirs alone, but mine to bear as well, for it is I who allowed such harm. 

I am a woman of weak will and little self-respect, who would much rather follow three steps behind in the darkness I've always known then to lead the way on to a bright, unknown future.

I find no reasoning with myself.

This life has taught me nothing, but fear and mistrust of myself above all others.

It is better I meet my own end now.