Beauties Defiance

never wanted to go through life not knowing who i was

yet I'm steady sitting here lost and confused 

i know that i was given a special ability by god 

to create fictional an nonfictional beauty 

through my eyes 

this gift  you call a talent

this talent you call art

i know that in this world i find myself in 

there are people just like me

people born with the same ability to create unique beauty

they,re classified as artist

an so i am an artist

or at least i am in consideration 

of being classified as one

that literally the only thing i really know about me

i spent years using my talent as my motivation

repeating to myself , that this talent is my god given ticket to a better world

i surrounded my life goals. around it till i actually found it 

the path that would help me find me.....

on this path were people who would invite me into 

that of the unknown 

these people showed me things that i thought i needed to define me

because of these people  i started 

to turn my eyes blindly to what i once saw as beauty 

i started to cover my face  with heavy foundations,  eyes shadowed in various colors, lips painted in different shades  from red to  pink.  

my body became starved and tired 

as i skipped meals and ran miles 

trying to fit into smaller clothes

more pleasing to the eyes of

man staring at me 

with constant hunger in their eyes

i became a chemical candy 

something both bitter sweet an sour with a gentle after taste 

that gave them wanting more

yet kept them at a disadvantage  

because of my innocents