the beauty of nature (why i'm here)

May 27, 2013

part of why i'm here is to enfold the beauty of nature with beautiful things its always dazzling to see.......... the trees the flowers the water the breezing wind the mighty sun the brightfulness of beauty the light of nature and the stature of fresh trees brings me joy from earth with its blossom of flowers they have the power to breeze away from any curse the smell brings romanticism to my life because nature of all creation is beautiful in my sight have flowers that grows there are flowers that die and those will be the years i continue to gain more strength, more power

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Comments (5)

MVP-Most Valuable PoetDec 18, 2015

<p>it's from the heart</p><p>i wanted to diversify my thoughts and connected to things people can relate to</p><p>check out my other poems i wrote</p><p>thank you for the comment</p>

mattrushDec 18, 2015

<p>Nice efforts friend. Well written poem. I really appreciate it.You beautifully express the Nature in your lines.</p><p> </p><p> </p>

alex80Jun 23, 2015

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MVP-Most Valuable PoetAug 8, 2013

<p>i was reading your comment and i needed clarity in some of your feedback</p><p>the wording was a little off</p><p>this poem reflects the beauty of nature in my eyes</p><p>there are many ways to view nature depending on one's style</p><p>i don't personalize what people comment on my poems</p><p>i will not accept insults from nobody (i'm not assuming you are)</p><p>just saying in general</p><p>what i would suggest is read this poem again and provide me feedback from a different standpoint</p><p>plus, this is my 1st poem writing about nature (diversifying my poetry)</p><p> </p>

EunoiaAug 8, 2013

<p> </p><div>that's all?</div><div> </div><div> </div><div>these are only suggestions from my experience which may differ from yours</div><div>you may be a genius in which I am sorry for this critique please don't take me too seriously</div><div> </div><div>first of all you are very repetitive</div><div>which lessens your power with words. </div><div> </div><div>but also you switch from general to using imagery? i think we can get the message that you are being general without saying so. </div><div> </div><div>i like your poems but this one needs some work. you have great vocabulary mostly though. </div><div>next, beautiful?</div><div>show me! you can't say that without making your reader question. </div><div>frankly, its like a fairy tale.  you never know what it looks like. the earth is beautiful, i know, but this poem isnt reflecting that. </div><div>else you need a plot, act like you are trying to convince an alien in a letter that earth isn't just pollution but beauty.  </div><div>you need a story but there is no gradual change of thought in this story, no development, you don't really say anything. work on your character or maybe a compare and contrast poem . i want to read a conclusion, most novice poets start with nature by it self i think. (even me! i love nature!) but i want to see more. </div><div> </div><div>i see that you tried that but you don't go into detail.  you have really nice phrasing here and there and its all and all really nice poem. </div><div> </div><div>heres some questions:</div><div>why is you character struggling or in need of strength? what does he / she want? </div><div>how did he/ she realize the beauty in nature?  who are they talking to----generally/figuratively/literally? </div><div>where is she/he? when is she/he? the future? the past?</div>