Because I Love/ Loved You

I was me, just happy and carefree, but had a thirst for someone 

My thirst was filled, prayers answered and dreams came true

I finally had my other half, my comforter and help

Because I love you, I apparently forgot who I was, my ambition, my value, that all I ever thought about was you 

It even distracted me from my focus at school 

Thinking that it was okay to be disrespected and to move along with life

Because I loved you I followed my heart, thinking that my mind was right

and knowing that nobody was gonna interfere, I laid down that promise 

Because I Loved You I revealed all my truths and held no lies, a good relationship holds no secret

And because I trusted in you, I knew I was safe, never to be exposed 

Never in a state of dishonesty, unloyalty, and untrustworthy 

I was in love, like really

And I knew I would do whatever to keep you happy, to make you happy 

Always wanting to see the glistening smile every time I saw you, or through  the digital screen and even hear through the cellular worlds

Because I love you money doesn’t buy happiness, but proving that I’m you’re happiness is the best 

Remember I’m your number one fan, your hype man, your seducer, and comforter 

Don’t be afraid to open up to me and not just leaving me hanging for days, but because I Loved you I let things go your way 

Because I Loved you I would always pray for you, to be in good health and have protection over you

Because I was soo in love with you I really couldn’t think for myself, nothing came to mind and I meant nothing. 

Stupid stuff and decisions were said and it made you mad, I had to look at the world differently from your perspective, in a way it wasn’t me

And i changed somehow, because I Loved you

You spoke words of vulgar, no control 

My friends disliked it, and I defended you because I didn’t see anything wrong

It was a warning I cold-shouldered 

Your ego of no patience, couldn’t even wait till time was right  and didn’t listen to the thoughts and instructions from me, a women? Not even....a lady 

I knew what was better, we from two separate worlds but I still listened to your comments cause I loved you 

Your disrespect towards my own image, who formed my heart in 9 months and was definetly not gonna let it break in 15 sec 

Your action of bombarding me with words and making me feel less, then saying your sorry...why? Because you know you can get anything you want 

Don’t say sorry if you’re not gonna change and listen

But because I Loved You I still held on, until the white blood cells were no longer of use

Not knowing that this virus was destroying me slowly, and taking over, even the relationship 

It ended up making me sick and any remedy never gave me a chance to heal.

Because I Loved you I knew you were in love too, but it had to end 

You gave it your all, but it would be better off with someone else who would be better

“Just because I let you go, doesn’t mean I wanted to”

At the end of the day pressure was removed and I felt free, nothing to worry about but I still loved you

I couldn’t sleep and was crying really because I felt all the blame is to be upon me 

But all because I love you 

Love is a very loose word, but use it with meaning 

Use it with proof, and use it with your heart 

Love can be a fool sometimes, but don’t let the little things take over  love 

Listen to your surroundings, your friends, and family

Most importantly you

If you don’t feel like yourself nor the respect you should get 

Leave, this relationship it isn’t for you.

You are powerful, beautiful, and strong remember that