Because I Love You

Because I love you

I trust we will get better;

Because i love you

Ill ignore the comments and hateful bantor.

Because i love you

Maybe i am too close to my male friends...

Because I love you

Perhaps it is time I cut them out rather than let them in.

Because I love you

Ill wear more layers and hide my figure.

Because i love you

Ill do this so they dont see a sleazy picture.

Because I love you 

I know its only abuse if its physical;

Because I love you

You promised itll never again get to that level.

Because I love you

Ill open my eyes to the real problems i have internalized;

Because I love you 

Im starting to realize

That its not me who should feel worthless

Nor should I want to end this

It is you.

Your supposed to pick me up, not push me further down.

We're supposed to smile together, no biased frowns.

Moms should give unwavering love,

The only thing unwavering from you is your scorn.

This is not love.

You do not know love!

But it is because I unjustly love you

That i will eventually forgive the things you do.

For forgiveness is the only remedy

That and some years of therapy.

You may not now understand that words hurt;

But when you age,

And the pack empties,

Words of atonement will spew from your throat.