Because I Love You

"Because I love you" excites.

There is a rush of euphoria that fills each vein in my body with warmth.

There is a feeling of protection as if no one could ever harm me.

I feel as if I matter. It is so unfamiliar to me.

You keep me from putting myself into situations that could harm me.

And yet, when I am safe, you still often get upset.

When that man complimented my scarf, you shot me a cold stare and stayed silent until we got home.

We walked in the door, you slapped me across my face, and I fell to the ground.

As I cried out, "Why are you doing this?", you yelled, "Because I love you."

"Because I love you" stings.

There is a flow of despair that consumes each muscle in my body with a brisk chill.

There is a feeling of vulnerability as if anyone is capable of harming me.

I feel as if I never mattered. It is so unfamiliar to me.