Becoming Angry At Myself for the Loss of Love

"I am picking out the glass underneath my feet from stepping on your littered beach. I tossed it back into your sea and poisoned the wildlife, killed off its resources. The water grew toxic so I couldn't swim. I swear to god it hurt me, I swear to god I never meant to say I love you with my hand on your back and you crying to the wall. I know this is terrible and I know you don't understand. I know I need help, I know we're both suffering. I swear I can change. I know I'm at fault...but I am not the only one to blame. God, please forgive me. My love, don't forsake me. I know I am guilty. I know I am broken. I know I am lost, please come and find me. I swam to the reef and now I am drowning. With glass in my veins and salt in my wounds. It's all okay if I drown inside of you."