...BEFORE...

I am in a haze in a fog with a gaze. My vision is all black and blurry, Oh, someone please help me! Someone please hurry! Why won't this go away like everyone else says I can't let this last yet another day! I NEED my life back I am sick of this need to attack. I just want to shout to everyone and yell out THIS IS NOT ME I AM NOT MYSELF!! HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE? Why can't I get a break? This is not a piece of cake, I am angry and depressed, I just can't get a rest. I want this to be DONE I can't wait until this is over I am sick of everyone else needing to cover, for me... I am going crazy, truly I am not this lazy. I dont know MYSELF anymore I just want to shut the door and go back to before. I am way beyond done I am THROUGH!! I am so sick of fighting ME, MYSELF, and I (which is YOU!!!) Silly girl... Lauren you need to stop before you combust, and 'POP!' I can't move on with this still going on. My faith and my hope is slowly slipping no one understands there are no helping hands... Can't stop the fog so very thick I can't get out! There is NOTHING I want MORE than to go back to BEFORE. when I was my happy self.. The real me! When nothing was in my way, if only... I could go back to that day, I wish I could go back to... ...BEFORE...