Before

I do not want to want you

That's what I think

As I sit across from you 

I watch your cigarette smoke billow around your face

And hear the clink of the ice in the glass you take little sips from

I see you think, it flashes across your face, and you lean closer and say something that ruins everything

"This all could've been us."

I never thought of it. Correction.

I never thought of it for long

It was way easier

Before.

Before I hated the way cigarette smoke smelled

How whiskey tasted

You have changed everything. 

I cannot rememeber before you.