Billie

***BIllie*** I keep my mouth stitched shut With your venom in my veins Every time I let you in You weaponize the pain You say it's all illusions, all the demons in my head But you never heard a fucking word I said Cold eyes staring through me like I'm already dead You feed me fake affection just to leave me misled Every scar I showed you turned to something you denied Now I bury every feeling somewhere deep inside So don't ask why I fade into the dark tonight You killed the part of me That ever tried to fight I don't trust nobody, not a single fucking soul Every hand that touched my heart just left another hole You tell me all the suffering is made up in my brain But you never gave a damn, you only watched me break Now the walls are higher than they've ever fucking been I'd rather drown alone than let you close again You never cared about me, just a version you could use Now I choke on all the truth while you distort the proof You left me like a prison with no windows and no light Turning all my nightmares into reasons I should hide Said I was too unstable, too addicted to the grief Like pain's a fucking choice instead of buried underneath I tried to let you hold me when the darkness took control But you just picked apart the broken pieces of my soul Now every conversation feels like stepping on a landmine One wrong word and suddenly my blood is on the line So save your shallow sympathy and empty alibis You only ever listened just to sharpen all your knives I don't trust nobody, not a single fucking soul Every hand that touched my heart just left another hole You tell me all the suffering is made up in my brain But you never gave a damn, you only watched me break Now the walls are higher than they've ever fucking been I'd rather drown alone than let you close again You never cared about me, just a version you could use Now I choke on all the truth while you distort the proof Maybe I'm a lost cause, maybe I was born wrong Maybe every memory's another funeral song But I know what a bitter end tastes like in the dark And your name still echoes every time my chest sparks You called me paranoid, said I needed help While you stood there watching me destroy myself Now there's nothing left to save, nothing left to try It's just a ghost inside a body slowly turning into dust I don't trust nobody, now the damage is complete Every lie you ever told still crawls beneath my skin You swore the pain was fiction, said I made it all insane But the bloodstains on my soul still spell out your name So I lock myself away where nobody can reach 'Cause vulnerability just gives predators a feast You never cared about me, you just loved control Now I carry all this hatred like a grave inside my soul