Blank

I’d love to change everyone’s bad memories to good ones, To start I’ll share my bad memories: I feel like speaking no words. No sound can come out of my heart. Why can’t my mind be blank? I hate the pain I feel. I love the pain I feel. I’m surrounded by my own silence. I’m surrounded by my own screams. I still think. I still feel, But sometimes I’m numb. I find moments of peace, moments of pure bliss, and then my mind awakens. When my thoughts stir no smile will spread across my face. I look good. I look bad. I feel as though I’m stuck, but I’m told the wind might sweep my light body away. Do I feel good? I’m surrounded by my own silent screams. Everything is inside, but yet it shows outside. Do I feel bad? I still think and feel. I’m emotionless and yet emotions attack me. I hate the pain! The illogical frustration. The beginning of lies and hiding, behind words that hurt to say. I hate the cold feeling thrust towards me. It’s my fault. It’s my problem. I love the pain! It’s success. It’s the perfect look. It’s the sun shining in my mind. My goal is the pain? The light goes out. My mind shuts down. There is so much to gain! How much more can I lose? Let me be! You don’t know my image, my hate, my love, my sweet and sour pain. It’s all from my mind. I have no words to speak from my heart. I desire the few moments of peace. Why can’t my mind be blank? I promise, I'll change everyone's bad memories, to good ones.