Much like poetry’s subjective nature

Is pain’s unobjective quality,

Its indescribable feature.

Zeus had been suppressing reaction to 

The great pain pounding in his head,

All day he had been made to endure

What felt like a skull-splitting 

Migraine; he wished he was dead.

He had prided himself all his life

On his toughness, his grit,

But today he simply couldn’t

Bear this agony, he was too weak

To handle it, he had to admit. 

His lightning gaze

Danced with stormy dark clouds

He wished would temper

Acute beams of artificial light

That just might land him in a shroud.

And eventually, he had to concede

Listening to his instincts was wise

Zeus was now struggling to breathe.

Seeking help, he could no longer deny his need

Yet instead of soothing him,

The nurse made it worse.

Advil wouldn’t work, nor 

Would napping, massaging,

Stretching. This headache

Now seemed an unbeatable curse.

Regrettably, all his school could

Now do was send him back 

To his dorm, sucking a lollipop

And sipping some water

Lest his vision go black.

When his roommate came home,

The freshman Hephaestus, with

An unequaled giddiness, jumped

And landed on Zeus, now lounging

In bed. Such headaches were of myth,

Not reality, Zeus thought as

Hephaestus’s inertia slammed 

His head straight into the wall. 

An unearthly pressure became

The only reality. He surely was damned.

He felt streaks of warm blood

Running down his face

One after the other

Down his neck, soaking into

His shirt at an incredible pace.

Suddenly the scream of

“Yo, a chick’s in our room!”

Emitting from his naive roommate,

Caused Zeus to open eyes he didn’t

Realize were closed, and he witnessed his doom.

A woman come into being from out 

Of the blue, like Venus emerged

From the sea, an angel appeared

From the murky depths of his thoughts,

Out of his skull it seemed she surged.

Though this couldn’t be right,

Couldn’t be real, Zeus had been taught

Many things were ‘impossible,’ yet

There seemed to be no other explanation;

His headache was gone, it no longer fought.

And the woman was now here,

In a sundress, wearing  

A Pi Beta Phi necklace

And bracelet set. She seemed

Like a girl who was daring,

Indeed she appeared quite born

For some friendly female hazing.

The moral of this chaotic parable

We hope will be befit.

Please always wear protection

When sharing your thoughts

With a prospective romantic partner

And please refrain from inhaling 

Them afterwards, lest you are onslaught

By cranial pain and phenomenal brain children. 

This was not our intention when we 

Created that phrase.