Breaking Free Hell, from the Prison created by Me

 

 

A million and one things I want to remember to do, remember to say, or simply just remember a happy day.  Be that as it may, I also find myself wishing all the painful memories would go away. It’s like I stay stuck on the small things, till I am distracted by another thing, I feel like I can’t function to the best of my abilities, no matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to think clearly.  I can’t seem to focus on anything but the pain, because it hurts so much more than it ever has, and considering I am in prison, it’s all been in vein. It hurts so bad, that it cripples me, until I convince my heart to feel angry, it’s not productive I know, but still I allow it to consume me, because it is a tiny break from all the hurt that holds me captive in this prison of misery. I always feel sad, I always feel alone, so inside of me the anger and rage I let it all roam. It’s the only break I seem to get since happiness takes up such little space in my memory, in fact the feeling that sparks a smile in me has been so short lived and rare, that I wonder, if it was just a dream, not that I even care.  This is dark I know, but my heart might not survive another blow. If I want to make it out this prison, I think I need to get angry and use fire that burns like the sun. I have to build that fire, give it oxygen, help it breathe, that way it can give me the strength to fucking break free. Out of all this pain, regret, and misery, watch me as I fight to be free. When it’s all said and done, I promise you’ll see regrets I will have not one, because I hurt, I fell, I got trapped in my mind which was hell. I fought to turn my hurt to anger, so I could break free from the pain that entrapped me. It was necessary you see, if I ever want to love me, success is what I seek, and happiness is right over this peak. I am strong, not weak, and everything I need will always lie right inside of me.

 

This poem is about: 
Me

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