bullet to the brain

i just wanna end it screw this crap put a bullet to my brain but a knife to my throat i perfer to die than be alived im trapped in hell rescue me bullet all in my head can't get it out bullet to the brain, i just wanna end life but the same time i just wanna be with you, but i am so confused bout what to do so put the bullet to my brain an let me go, bullets all in my head an stabbed in the heart with darts