Butterfly

Life does not always unfold as planned. People may promise always to guide you throughout the various trials in life. Life moves so fast at times and even more often you can become overwhelmed by the surging waves of sorrow. All anyone can hope to do is to perserve and learn how to wade in the whirlpool that is life. Those closest to us may become stiff and cold and lay in the earth's womb six feet below. What are we to do? How can I ever understand something that is beyond this realm, you told me do not bother try understanding why you left and I finally understood what you meant by that. Nonetheless, there are things that I do understand. You did not leave on your own accord, you were snatched by the wicked embrace of the cloaked reaper that resides in the realm of eternal darkness. But you told me you would never leave me. You told me you would always stand by me until the end of the world. You told me you would help me endure the burden that is the world upon my shoulders. That I can never understand. Why did you lie to me? I just have this painful desire to see you once more, you alway possesed the anwers to all of my curious inuiries. Now you are just a silent butterfly, gliding above me and watching and guiding me throughout my life. But I do not need that, I need someone to be there for me. There is a massive void contained within my heart that cannot be filled despite all my efforts to mend the gap. I tried cutting. I just wanted to lie in your embrace once again. I just want to be in silent bliss with you forevermore. I am done grieving for you mother. I am coming for you. My wings have been clipped by the incision of one too many slashes that life have done. I am tired of the ravenous creatures that gnaw at my cursed brain. I cry out that I just wish I could place my head upon the rails of a train track and let the train roar and decimate my cursed brain. All of our precious memories that I hold dear to my heart are tainted with sorrow. I see life in a different perspective now and just want to be normal again. Please mother, I understand and I love you because people die but real love is forever.