A call to my subconscious

Hello, Julie's subconscious speaking

It's so good to talk to you, how are you?

Good. Good!

Well, I have been a mess since you left.

Don't get me wrong, I wanted you gone,

It's just now my life is... confusing.

Every little detail is thrown into question

Is the sky really blue? 

The grass really green?

Do I really have to wait an hour before I swim?

and some bigger things.. 

You know every morning I face her...

That girl you called beautiful, 

with golden hair and bright eyes.

That girl you called... Selfish.

Starring in that mirror I can coun't your lies,

when a hug wasn't a hug,

because the counter arguement was digging into my thigh.

When a playful slap stung to much

and you said relax, it's just a game.

When you said I was gaining weight 

after I dropped a jean size.

Now I wonder...

Do women really belong in the kitchen?

Is there a right and wrong party or just people?

Do guys really not like smart girls?

Was I the biggest part of your life,

or just your biggest mistake?

And the biggest question yet,

are you really a phone call away?

At least I can anser that one.

I don't want you a phone call away

I want miles, years, planes, boats...

a bullet between us.

So.. 

it's day 365 since I left

and I spotted another lie

Here I stand,

without you, 

ALIVE!