Can I be found?

I know I should be happy. I have loving parents. My life isn't bad. I'm not poor. I'm not sickly. I'm not hated. But I still don't know how I'm supposed to act. Or How I'm supposed to feel. I don't know how to fix this. I am not happy. with my life. With my school. With my friends. And I don't know whether it's just me. Jyst me being ungrateful not being content but I am not happy. I think I need help. I don't know what to do anymore. I am lost in this world without a way of climbing out. I am lost in my emotions. I am lost in my mind that holds me captive longer than I'd like. And I don't know how to fix this. Should I give up. Or Should I get help. And if I do, How should I tell, That I want out That I want to be free. Free to make my own choices Choices that could ruin my image Choices that will break down these walls I hate. Oh how I hate these walls so much. Or Should I tell them that I am lost and I don't know whether or not I want to be found? Should I tell them I have lied to many times to remember who I am. Should I tell them that I have a fear of being free Free from the walls I have put up around me. The walls in my head. The walls in my mouth. The walls I am scared to break down. Should I tell them that I am tired of being confined to this side of the line I drew for myself in the sand. The line that I do not dare to cross. The line that keeps my mouth shut from blurting out what I want to say, because it might break the facade I have built for myself. The line that keeps me in good standing with my family. The line that haunts me when ever I speak. Should I tell them I fear the choices that I will make. The choices that I don't know how to make. The choices that coupd break me. I am lost. I am lost within the Abyss I call my mind. I am lost within a world where all my choices are chosen for me. I am lost. lost in an alternate reality in my mind that showes me the me I could be. The alternate reality that I could live in if I just stopped this reality for me. If I just Gave up. But I am lost swimming in a sea of uncertainty. So for now I will sit in the corner of my mind that tells me I can keep it up just a little longer, just a little while longer it whispers to me. Just untill you make it. Just untill you make it.