Can I find myself in the mirror?

If I can know the main of my life, then, i’ll Have the power to be a personality .. but, I really can not find anything but darkness.. I’m fealing like a stranger falling in a dusty hole .i couldn’t breathe underneath all this pain .. I’m feeling like a mist in a world of strangers who can’t understand what I express .. they said I’m such an eccentricitie person .. human .. just a someone who mustn’t exist in this misery universe .. I always thinking, why do I have to suffer? What reason did I give? I really believe in god, but god doesn’t show me the good response that I want .. I need a hand which patting on my shoulder and telling me that everything would be alright .. I just have to be more strength and motivate to be in the most highest area in a hill .. a hill that called:”the real life.” .. we must be together and loving each other .. we have to be kind to each other .. we have to be gentle and kind to each other .. even if the world is filling of hate and poverty .. we need you god, so, don’t you disappointment us .. ‘cause we trusting in you .. and we believe in you .. show me that you’re caring .. I love you all from the bottom of my heart.. god bless you all!