Sometimes it’s like I can still feel her little fingers Pushing their way through the monkey bars of her cage, Still feel the gashes she made trying to claw her way out. In the dark bottomless abyss where you used to be able to find my hopes and dreams I can still hear the echoes of her voice Like whispers, Makes me miss her. It kills me she never got to know how much I love her. I never showed her how much I needed her. Always thought she would be there when I was ready to get back to her. Such a ball of fire Smile always on her face But she was so restless, always trying to interfere in everything I did So I had to knock her down a notch Still she would always manage to get back up So I had to hit her. And Hit her. And Hit her I just kept bashing her into submission I saw her tears and her blood and her bruises But the more I bashed her the more its face began to look less and less like a face Without a face, without a mouth that could speak, without eyes that could pierce my heart It just wasn’t human anymore; Could be locked away and ignored. I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess it wasn’t a bird Because the caged bird sings but it just died. Stopped struggling, starved, suffered, but did not sing She died. Or passed away. Or moved on. The point is she’s gone and I want her back. I miss her. I miss watercolor finger paintings of rainbows on my fridge Rainbows that didn’t even mean that she was gay Just that She Liked Colors Still miss the scent of snicker-doodles for Santa lingering in the air The epic trips to “Toys R Us” each and every year Coming home with 920 watermelon sour patches worth of Barbie dolls That she would never even get the chance to try to become. She was my everything. So sometimes I think I'd give the world or absolutely anything to get back my little girl But where she’s gone I can’t bring her back. It’s impossible. Still I can’t help but keep hoping for miracles, Spending all my birthday wishes. And you would think I'd have learned my lesson by now about putting candles out But wishing on stars just doesn't seem like it'll work When the few stars I do see just don't shine as bright as her eyes Used to.