China

When I was young I was told

If I were to dig a hole deep enough 

I’d end up in China Oh China

What unforeseen treasures do you behold

Are you the place to escape to 

In the face of corruption and oppression

From the red white and blue

An oppressive eyesore within itself?

Will the other end of my hole

Reveal banners of the red and yellow 

Like the ones that adorn the burgers and fries

That dry the tears in my eyes

Tell me why do I love you 

As if I can’t live without you?

A mere dream to dig a hole

Gripping the shovel

Like an orphan gripping 

To the first thing it sees

Or like a whore gripping

To her trauma as an orphan

We hold the things darker than black

Closest to our most delicate hearts

China do your people know of any suffering

When you most certainly are the earthly heaven?

You most certainly are your own ginger jar

Standing unphased and beautiful

Do your people wish to be anywhere else

Do they dream of digging a whole to 

Any other destination?

How porous your soil must be 

From all the holes of the dreamers 

Dreaming of their dreams coming true

I refuse to dream one second more

For my back gets wearier

And my hair grayer by the days

And my world a never ending maze

I grip the shovel

Harder than ever before 

And I dig in the real life

And I don’t stop

For I know of nothing else

Yearn for nothing else

Deeper I go

And so does my desire

As the brown crust of the earth

Turns black and hot 

I realize that

The prize that you are 

China

Was never there

And now me,

My shovel and soul

Are now in a bottomless hole.