Choices

Choice...that's a powerful word, choices...we make choices everyday. As we decay with sin in our DNA, we relay our thoughts into actions, feeding our passions; lust, anger, pride, greed, and envy. Please send me to a hospital, i need help..I've been used and abused from choices other people made.. made me hate myself and those around me i constantly drown me in a sea of self pity regularly deaden me so it will seem like I'm okay i wear the mask to keep others away so they don't see my hurt, so they don't see the worst of me the worst that has been done to me all because of a choice someone made... Choices...I make choices everyday. At times I choose to hold a grudge and have hate in my heart to follow the art the father of lies started centuries ago. I know, I know it sounds bad...almost as bad as... being molested having this weight being rested on my mind everyday like and old tape on rewind I find my mind in that place and time... being hurt, my body being used like dirt, and similar occurrences afterwards, words cannot explain how much i hurt. But every minute i learn, I'm desperately trying to turn. This liar tried to turn my joy into sorrow, give me hopelessness for tomorrow. But i continually borrow from the one who is my source, Satan made his choice and he knows where he is going. He is not going to make my choice because it's the father's hand I'm holding. He is molding my mind, soul, and body he got me in a trans, i rest in his plans. Going his way, his he best way, in every way imaginable...Choices although I'm angry at wrong i choose to fight for what is right, I'm angry at abuse but i choose to fight to loose from the past angry at disappointments but i choose to trust God, who anoints and appoints his people for greatness. The more i focus in that the more i hate less. Love more, grow, fly, soar, to the top, cause that's what Christ died for. Furthermore, i can't carry these burdens anymore so i give them to you because i am weak and heavy laden the mask is off and i see my face and...I'm okay i choose everyday to give my hurt and pain, so that i will gain life.... this life and the one to come, I'm overcome with joy. Joy the world did not give, joy the world cannot take i choose to make my life. Not according to my circumstance but according to Christ's example. Christ made a choice to die so i might live and i should live, and die to self, and my flesh. Die my flesh. Choices.......