The CLOSE letter never sent...

Dear Boy, 

We met summer 2013. We were just freshmen. We started rough and somehow, we ended up this close. We became best friends and we've been through so much. We are so close. You were the first boy to call me pretty and make me feel good about myself. I felt so blessed. That was sophomore year. Junior year not as close but I helped you with your girl problems and we were still considered besties. Senior year though was really something else. We got SO close. I gave you a ride home EVERY day and we talked EVERY day and I don’t know we just got close. I'll never forget the day when your dad asked what you gave me for giving you a ride home and you said eternal friendship. I truly felt that. I know we argued A LOT but I truly felt we were BFFs. The day I gave a piece of myself to you was not only because I liked you but because it all made sense. I was most comfortable around you. I trusted you the most. We are well...were that close. You didn't have to like me back. Whether it was you did or you didn't and you didn't want to hurt my feelings, it didn't really matter. I just wanted our friendship. That friendship. We were close. But you used my innocence and took advantage of my kindness and trust me that hurt a whole lot worse than a simple "I don't like you that way" would have. I thought everything you told me about our friendship was true, but then you did this to me. Were we really that close? I just want to know what I did wrong. Did I hurt you this bad for you to hurt me this bad? Was I mean to you? "Sex won't change our friendship," you said...we said. But it changed when you decided to play with my emotions when you could have just told me what it was. We were supposed to be close. What happened to honesty? You really hurt me and I don't know how to move on but I will move on. I have to learn to love myself and not rely on you or anyone tell me I'm pretty or that I'm a good person. I relied on you so long to fulfil this feeling I just needed to find in myself. I don't deserve to be called a man, a slut, a horse, a whore, a bitch. I don't deserve to be pushed around and used. You were wrong when you told me no one is ever going to love me and no one cares about me because people do love me and people do care. I'm just looking for answers as to why all this happened to me when all I ever did was be nice to you and do things for you and truly be a good friend. I just thought we were close. I'm the one that defended that asshole image you like to portray because in my eyes you were not this horrible person. But of all people to treat like shit you chose me. I guess it's just so upsetting because we were close. I guess there is no answers as to why this happened. I guess we weren't that close. I now know my worth and what I deserve and it's not you however I hope to find the bond we once shared with someone else and I hope you do too with a promise that you won't hurt her the way you hurt me.  I allowed you to see the true me only for you pretend you loved me and get in my pants and act like what we had was just nothing. We never truly were that close. I wish nothing but the best for you. This chapter is now closed. Thanks for the memories. 

Sincerely, Girl