College

I stare into the auditorium 

Filling with people of all colors,shapes, and sizes.

I stare at the projected screen on the washed out white wall.

The professor calls for order and the people sit awkwardly in the old and squeaky chairs.

I take a seat next to someone I've never before seen on campus,

trying to make friends quickly so as to not get left behind or fade into the rest of the crowds.

My friends from the years before are no longer beside me

as we continue to be separated by our statuses as we reach towards our dreams with outstretched hands.

The professor calls out the names from the signup sheet, making sure we are all here.

I am exhausted from the work of days past, struggling to keep my eyes open.

Struggling to pay attention and struggling to keep it all balanced.

I hear my name and force myself to answer, but it's not loud enough and he calls again.

I call back, louder this time, almost a little too loud, but he is satisfied and moves on down the list.

By the end of class, I am exhausted still and make my way out of the crowded hall and down the stairs.

I finally reach the doors to the outside world and take a leap down the stairs into the crisp fall air.

The breeze wakes me up enough to get me to my next class without major error.

But I am still exhausted. I am tired from working day and night trying to afford this "opportunity".

I work multiple jobs in order to make the hefty tuition. A clerical job in the evening,

a custodial job from night until early mornings. I sneak in an hour or two of sleep

before heading to my job at the local cafe until I'm off to class again.

Struggling to stay awake, struggling to keep it balanced.

But I keep pushing myself harder and harder. Even though, it ain't easy.

So sometimes, when you get in my face for not doing well on that last test,

or maybe for falling asleep during reading time, sometimes I snap.

I work my fingers to the bone in order to come to your class, to even afford the opportunity.

I am paying my own way in this world.

Because my parents make "too much" money for me to get financial aid -

though they barely make enough to survive on their own, let alone help me.

So yeah, I am working harder to pay my own way in this world.

So let me be or help me out, it's your choice.

But recognize when you need to get out of my face or I swear, one day I really will

SNAP.