College dreams

The thoughts were swirling in my mind. Would they be funny, cruel or kind?

Would I be ready for what's ahead or wish instead that I were dead?

Would all back home forget my name? Or would things just remain the same?

Well no, of course that couldn't be, with all these changes facing me.

Excited, scared and insecure. Oh tell me why I'm so unsure?

I wanted this now, boy do I ever! The chance to grow and change, endeavor.

To try to be and to become. So why at times am I so numb?

I go from numb, to scared, to dread and then the days I stay in bed.

To hard to face the great unknown, but not to, would be my chance blown!

I see me on the mountain peak and then at once it all seems bleak.

Conflicted? Yes that says it best. I'm up I'm down I just can't rest

I'm tied in knots, at times on fire to turn it up, to go much higher.

Higher then I've ever been! To do this first I must begin.

Begin I must. I push ahead in spite of all the things I dread.

To go the distance I could fall but not to go would lose it all.

Not to risk to see my dreams is why I'm shredded at the seams

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I dream of life adventure filled and being absolutely thrilled.

Exhilarated, full of zest to reach my goals would be the best.

To soar, to fly to see the world. On wings of eagles passions swirled.

So do I go or do I stay? Play it safe or seize the day?

I want it all and then some more, to walk through that wide open door.

The door of my future and the rest but first I have to past this test.

Test one is walking past my fears to get to all that I hold dear.

The who I am and want to be, pulling all inside of me.

To take step one is very scary but I must try I cannot tarry. Procrastinate or stall

or stop. The time is now to reach the top.

Please God I ask just go before me. Keep me,guide me, don't ignore me.

I'm digging way down deep inside and trusting I'll enjoy the ride.

The journey is as much a part of reaching goals inside my heart.

So now I press the button GO. For all it means these seeds I sow.

For without those seeds dreams cannot grow.Succeed or fail I have to know!

I think I know the lion I can be, but first things first all fear behind me!