A Comedian At Heart

Without a cover I rot

I sweat and stink

and itch

and feel

My vision blurs

my back aches

my words slur

my hand quakes

I cannot function

without my pills

The only person

who’ll hang a picture

of me

is my mother

because I’m all she’s got

No love for a hunchback

No love for a broken brain

No love for a man

that isn’t

So I clean myself

I deodorize

I straighten up

I take the pills

and the mockery

I keep believing

I keep trying

I keep going

I take it in good humor

I make them laugh

get the crowd on my side

make them think its just

a joke

That its all for them

These jokes aren’t for you

They help me get through it

they fight for me

keep me in good company

keep me fighting

keep me alive

keep me

from me.