confusion

I must confess I am confused all the time with what I should do

I choke my mind so many times a day on things I already know I should do

I have stopped breathing thinking so hard my face turns blue

I don't know what I should do

I am confused

Giving up and running

or

shutting up and slumming

Always doing what I am told 

so this fake love is what I hold

my thoughts and feelings are turning cold

feeling like I have sold my sole 

I am confused with this confusion its confusing

maybe one day it will all be amusing

this life I am abusing not knowing what I should do 

so many things 

so many ways 

to say that what I crave is not confusing 

I crave to grow the fast the slow 

no confusion sets in when I sit in

my green light and prune away 

what will turn to a gray decay amongst the hay

all the while forgetting the confusion of the day

I dream of greener pastures

where I am a gest amongst masters

 confusing to some to no longer be a slum

I am no longer confused on what I should do

I just have to step in the door 

the love i hold 

it is not cold 

it is not confusing