The Confusion of Love

I'm tired of writing all these letters to plead, hoping you become this man i need you to be; i see why it's my heart that you continue to lead, 'cause immature hearts and minds only make things bleed; for me it was never any fun and games, cause through your eyes i saw TRUE, and not your secret pain, your pain that you hid, and put fear on this plate..of a menu of hurt, that you did unconciously create, out of fear, you abided, and made me a victim, of a bitter-sweet, sour love, that bit me with venom, love venom, that sucked me out of this life i've know to be, into a world of confusion, that only consisted of you and me this world, in which inside it, i am not yet stable and secure, constantly wondering where to turn, or what's on the other side of the door in this state of shame, and city of denial, i try not to lose myself, but i feel so convicted without given trial; now through my eyes and into yours i try to read.. if it's really you that is for me, ... Or just this man that you claim yourself to be is it me?