A Connection With a Lost Sister

How are you my big sister, and I look up to myself?

I thought you were suppose to be there for me when I needed someone's help.

What happen to you reminding me of childhood memories, braiding my hair, singing me songs and countless treasuries?

What happen to that bond that we were suppose to have as we got older?

And the times mama told me that you were doing bad, and said "I told her".

What happen to the smile I suppose to keep upon my face?

But instead I have a frown of disgrace.

Why did you let the boy down the street touch on you?

I  saw out the corner of my eye, and I thought you told him to shoo.

Why can't I talk about you at the big sister conventions?

And tell all my friends you have big goals and great missions.

Why you do it to me?

How could you let me down?

Why didn't you fight for whats yours?

Why didn't you leave out of town?

Staying here got you stuck on a crack pipe, every night.

Why didn't you have bigger dreams instead of letting pot and cigars control you?

Why didn't you do greater things, and listen to what mama "told you"?

You bring tears to my eyes, because I see you were defeated.

Why didn't you finish high school, so I can say you were completed?

Why tell me lies to get what you wanted?

Why crush my soul and make it so darkened?

And till this day I still ask thyself.

How are you my big sister, and I look up to myself?