Control

And I sat on the shower floor while my bones ached

I begged for the room to stop spinning for just one second

I begged to a God I don't believe in to take my life right then

My heart ached

I needed for everything to just stop

I needed to just not be me at that moment

Everything was hurting

Everything was just too painful and I couldn't control any of it

I needed just wanted to be able to control something.